


Think About Me: Extra Log Collection

by supershadsy



Series: Think About Me [4]
Category: Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi, Polyamory, Story Collection
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-03
Updated: 2017-07-03
Packaged: 2018-11-22 17:02:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 19,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11384532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/supershadsy/pseuds/supershadsy
Summary: A compilation of short stories revolving around theThink About Meuniverse under the "extra log" moniker, originally posted to Tumblr.This will be left as "incomplete" for as long as necessary, and will close as "complete" once I feel I have left the project.





	1. Sephiroth History

**Author's Note:**

> These are arranged by original post date. Tags are going to be…iffy, since these go all over the place. I'll clean it up in the future, hopefully. I'm going to _try_ to date these in universe, but don't quote me on it. Timelines are very hard to organize when you're dealing with hard dates.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original post date: 5/4/16

1988.

Sephiroth, age 17, sat on his tiny bed with a guitar magazine spread out in front of him. _Finally, some peace and quiet,_ he thought, arranging his fingers on the fretboard. The tablature was simple exercises, and he slowly worked his hands up the fretboard, picking each note one by one in a steady rhythm. As soon as he ran out of strings, he started again, one fret up. _If I keep doing this, then I can practice real solos,_ he thought, shoulder length silver hair falling around his face. _Then maybe find a band--_

"Whatcha doin'?"

 _Short lived._ He didn't even look up. "Go away, Kadaj," he grumbled

Kadaj leaned against the door frame, pouting. "I'm bored--!" he exclaimed, running in and standing right in Sephiroth's face, on his tip toes. "Come play with me!"

Sephiroth sighed, finally acknowledging him. His blonde bowl cut was fringing at the sides, huge green eyes wide and persistent. "I said, _go away,"_ he repeated.

"No!" He stomped his foot. "You're _supposed_ to, that's your _job."_

 _Fucking kid._ "Go find Loz or Yaz." A headache began to throb right between his eyes.

"Loz is doing his stupid study whatever. Yaz said no. Mom's doing grown-up stuff. You _have_ to." Kadaj began to drag his fingers over the strings of his guitar, making discordant twangs. _Christ almighty._ _I thought that maybe when I got a real foster home I'd get some quiet, but I had to be adopted by the one woman who had three other fucking kids to take care of._

He yanked the guitar out of reach, throwing the strap off him and tossing it back on the bed. "Don't touch my guitar!" he exclaimed. _Did she adopt me so she didn’t have to hire a babysitter?_ His eyes flicked to the recruitment form taped to the wall right beside him. _One more year, just one more year and then I can fuck off for good,  
_

_if I can make 1st-class SOLDIER, then no one will be able to touch me--_

"Sephy!" Kadaj shouted, the whine of his childish voice rattling in his head. "Come on! I wanna play with my cars--"

"Don't call me that!" Sephiroth replied, swatting him away as he tried to grab at him. "Damn it, Kadaj--"

He gasped and clapped his hands over his mouth, then took a deep breath. _"Mom!"_ he yelled. _"Sephiroth swore at me--"_

 _Fuck!_ Sephiroth grabbed him in a choke hold and covered his mouth. "Nothing's wrong!" he called, then hissed in his ear. _"Shut up!"_

"Stop yelling!" Loz's voice cracked as he shouted from the next room over. "I'm trying to work!"

 _What the hell do you have to work on?_ Sephiroth thought, eyes unintentionally wandering to his backpack overflowing with school papers. _You're in fucking sixth grade...!_ He shook his head and let Kadaj wriggle free. "Fine, whatever. I'll play with your--whatever..."

He flashed him a toothy grin. "Awesome," he replied, running to his side of the room and digging through a chest in the corner. Sephiroth rubbed his temples. _Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me--_

The crashing of the front door froze them both. _What the...?_

"Listen lady, just sit still, and no one gets hurt."

 _Jenova...!_ Sephiroth eased himself off the bed as quietly as he could, putting his finger to his lips to Kadaj, and tiptoed out the bedroom door. _I know there've been a ton of robberies around, Sector 2 is the worst for it. It's covered in drug rings and dirty mako rings._ He swallowed hard as he crept in to the hallway, glancing over to the other bedroom. Loz was at his desk, absolutely still, while Yazoo sat up in bed, shaking their long hair out of their face. _Don't talk, don't talk, don't talk._ "Mom?" they called, high and tentative.

Sephiroth winced. _God fucking damn it!_ "Who's there?" the deep voice barked, accompanied by the loading click of a gun.

He took a step back, only to feel a foot underneath his. Kadaj was hiding right behind his leg. _Of fucking course--!_ "Go back!" Sephiroth whispered to him, full of venom.

Even though Kadaj's eyes were wide with terror, he shook his head. _Right. When's this little brat going to ever listen to me?_ He huffed and rushed down the hallway, right into the kitchen. There were two men, all in black with masks--one of them had the gun, rummaging through the cupboards, while the other held down his foster mother in her seat. _Jenova--!_ Her eyes flicked over to him, and she whimpered, gray streaked hair matted to the side of her face. "What the hell's going on?" Sephiroth commanded, straightening his shoulders to make himself look as tall as possible.

The man cocked the gun at him, aiming it higher as soon as he reassessed Sephiroth's height. "Don't worry, kid, we'll be done in just a minute. Fuckin' squalor--"

Sephiroth growled and snapped forward, acting quick enough to knock the gun out of the man's hand. "What the--!" he exclaimed.

"Get out!" Sephiroth barked, shoving him aside and running to the one who was holding Jenova. "Let her go!"

"Yeah, leave us alone!" Kadaj echoed, not quite keeping his pace with him. "Or else--"

"Or else _what,_ you little shit?"

Kadaj screamed, snapping Sephiroth's attention back. The man had grabbed him by the neck, lifting him high in the air as he squirmed under the grip. _Damn it, Kadaj--!_ Back around the table, he scurried around and wound up, punching the man in the side of the face, connecting with his nose. "Don't touch him!" he bellowed, feeling the crunch of cartilage beneath his knuckles. The man staggered back into the counter, dropping Kadaj. Sephiroth didn't manage to catch him before he hit the floor, but he did stand him up, running a hand over his head before standing up again. _"Loz!_ Some help!"

"Fuck this!" the man's accompanist choked, jumping back. He grabbed a sack and threw it over his shoulder. "Let's just get out of here, man!"

The other man held his bleeding nose in one hand, glaring at Sephiroth as he picked up his gun. "You stupid fucking punk!" he cursed, aiming the gun right toward his head. Fumbling, he pulled the trigger, but was two feet off his aim, shattering the flimsy particle board cupboards behind them. Sephiroth barely flinched. _Gotta work on your aim, there...  
_

But, as soon as the shot rang out, Kadaj wailed below him, and he could hear another frightened whimper from further back in the house. The two ran out, muttering to themselves, and slammed the door behind them, rattling on its hinges.

Sephiroth immediately went to his foster mother's side, kneeling by the chair as she caught her breath. "Are you okay?" he asked.

"Heavens," she panted, a shaking, age spotted hand clasping over his. "I-I'm fine, Sephiroth..."

"Are they gone?" Loz asked from down the hallway, looking around. "I th-thought I heard a gunshot..."

"Yeah, they're gone." Sephiroth pointed up at the hole in the cupboard. "Guy missed. I don't know what they took, if anything..."

"Oh, dear, your hand..." Jenova remarked. His knuckles were smeared with blood. _Ah._

Sephiroth found himself snickering. "It's not mine," he remarked with a smirk.  
She chuckled back, but it didn't quite meet her eyes. _At least you're not hurt  
_

_(mom)  
_

_Jenova._ Sniffling from behind him attracted his attention. Kadaj had crumbled to the floor, crying into his hands. "Ah, Kadaj..." he muttered. _He's a little shit, but that was a real scare..._

He walked over to him and hoisted him into his arms, heavy as he was. "Hey," he said. "Everything's okay, they're gone..."

Kadaj's eyes went wide, brimming with tears. "Y-y-you just...punched that guy...!" he stammered, snot running down his nose.

"I did," he replied. "What, did you think I was going to let him choke you like that?"

He could only make hitching noises. "Sephiroth's your brother, you know," Jenova chimed in.

 _Kind of._ Kadaj nodded slowly, before wrapping his arms around his neck and resting his head on his shoulder, face still moist with drool, snot, and tears. _I really, really thought I wouldn't have to deal with little kids again. Or getting mugged. Why couldn’t I get adopted into a family above the plate?_ He sighed, patting his back. "Come on," he muttered, walking back down the hallway.

Loz met him halfway. "That was cool," he said.  

Despite himself, Sephiroth felt his chest swell. "I guess so," he replied.

"Dude, it was." Loz leaned back into the door frame of his room. "Yaz, you can stop hiding, now..."

Sephiroth took the turn into his and Kadaj's room and set him down on his bed. "Shoot, you're heavy," he said, rolling his shoulders back. "If you're still feeling bad, I guess we can play with your cars, or something--"

"Sephiroth?"

"What?"

Kadaj fidgeted, but couldn't take his eyes off him. "You are really cool. Thanks."

 _Great, a shitty little brat thinks I'm cool._ He sucked his cheeks in to keep himself from smiling. "Yeah, sure," he replied. _I'll take it. Hell, I'll take whatever I can get._

He sighed as he stared back at his knuckles. _Better wash up..._


	2. A Little On Yaz

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original publish date: 5/19/16

1993.

On the first day of school in MSAD 2, a group of boys leand against the lockers in the freshman hall. "Time to scope out the fresh meat," one with a dark mullet said, adjusting his leather jacket. "Hey, hey, check out that chick over there…"

The "chick" was fumbling with their locker combination, in a flowing dress overshadowed with an oversized jacket. Long, platinum blond hair hung in their face, and they had a couple of flowers tucked behind their ears. The boy nodded to his compatriots, then rolled his shoulders. "Let's see how easy it is," he muttered, then made his way over.

As soon as he was right beside them, he perched one elbow over their head. "Hey there," he crooned. "Need a little help?"

They looked up at him, blue-green eyes wide and shining. "Um, I don't…" Their voice rang in a falsetto, until they cleared their throat, and it dropped slightly. He watched their Adam's apple bob in their throat. "I don't think so." They bit their lip and tucked a strand of hair behind their head, a gentle smile on their face.

The boy froze. "Wh-what the fuck?" he stammered. "You a fuckin' queer or somethin'?"

The teen stared. "Wh…what?"

Anger and frustration burned in his face, and they took a step back because of it. "You're a dude in a dress! What the hell?"

They hugged their arms around their chest, and as they did so, the edge of their jacket fell forward to reveal "CETRA" embroidered on the front. He ran a hand through his mullet and blinked. "Fuck," he cursed. "Cetra? Is that your name?"

The teen nodded slowly. "Y-yeah. I'm…I'm Yazoo Cetra."

His mouth hung open. "You…you gotta know Sephiroth, then. The war hero?"

Yazoo continued to wrap themselves in their jacket. "He's my…my brother," they stammered, voice reaching a higher pitch once again.

The boy's lip curled as he backed away. "Fine, fine." He turned on a heel and rushed back to his friends down the hall, constantly tugging on his leather. "Don't wanna fuckin' mess with a Cetra kid," he muttered to himself. "Even I can't fuck with a 1st-class SOLDIER with a body count…"


	3. Bad Company

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original publish date: 6/1/16

1994.

“All right, all right. Where are my 3rds?” 

Genesis Rhapsodos stood in front of a row of 3rd-class SOLDIERs, a blunt hanging out of the corner of his mouth as he swaggered back and forth. “Here’s the plan,” he said, balancing his red sword on his metal shoulder pad. “I’m gonna...go out there and give those guys a run for their money. In ten minutes...fall in line for back up.” 

“S-sir, you’re going to take on everyone by _yourself?”_ one of the SOLDIERs piped up. “Th-that’s impossible! Only Sephiroth can do that--”

Genesis spun on his toe, staring directly at him. “‘Scuse me?” he asked, smoke filtering from his mouth. “1st-class Cetra was _my_ protegé. You think _I_ can’t do anything _he_ can?” He chuckled, head tilted all the way back as ash fell onto his uniform. _I sure taught him more than just a few things._ “These Wutai fuckers don’t got shit on me.”

“B-but...” the SOLDIER tried again. “We’re here because the standards got wiped. Like, _completely_ overwhelmed. I don’t think we should--”

He bent right down in his face. “Listen, kid,” he growled, taking another hit of the blunt. The pungent smell of weed made the surrounding men back away, but his target was frozen in place, holding his breath. Red rimmed the outside of his deep, blue eyes. _“When the war of the beasts brings about the world’s end, the goddess descends from the sky.”_

He let the passage hang in the air, then started to giggle, eventually crescendoing into a full blown laugh, as he leaned on his sword for support. “Let’s just...let’s just say...” he wheezed as he caught his breath. “I’m gonna be the messenger of the goddess today.” 

The SOLDIERs only stared at him in silence as he coughed. _These mortals wouldn’t get it,_ he thought, his expression souring. _Fuck ‘em._ “All right, which one of you is gonna give me your company jacket?”

A few looks were exchanged, and eventually a red, 3rd class jacket was passed up to the front. “Excellent, excellent,” he muttered, sheathing his sword to hold out the jacket in front of him. “Just my size.” He missed the arm hole once, but managed to get it as far as his shoulder pads before he stopped. 

“Shit...” 

More struggling to get it off, staggering in the cloud of smoke he was producing as he wiggled his arms while his company watched in varying states of amusement. Murmurs rustled through the group. “Is he really smoking weed?” “That...that can’t be good...” “I hear he’s _never_ sober.” “How did some guy like this make 1st-class?” “He said he trained Sephiroth...”

_“Shut up,_ all of you,” Genesis growled, ripping off his shoulder pads and letting them clatter to the ground. His vision blurred as he scanned them all, and even as their words echoed in his head, the aggravation melted with another hit from his blunt. _Who cares, who cares. They can’t do what I can._

_They haven’t seen what I have.  
_

_They haven’t woken up in a stretcher with their arms covered in needle bruises, scars they don’t understand._

_But, they will. They will.  
_

_If they live to see it.  
_

He threw the jacket back on and rolled his shoulders back. “Ah, much better. Y’know, the only thing I miss ‘bout being 3rd is the red.” He finally pulled the blunt from his mouth to salute them. “Ten minutes. 2nds after another ten. Shouldn’t be much left after that.” 

He kicked open the door of the base, inhaling the dry, desert air. _“Oh, I was born sharp sword in my hand,”_ he sang quietly, spinning Rapier in his hand. _“Behind this sword, I’ll make my final stand...”_

The heat from the blazing sun and his own blazing high blurred the horizon, but Genesis could just make out a row of Wutai soldiers waiting for him. _Yeah, they’re ready for us,_ he thought. He held in his next hit in his lungs, waiting until he felt himself gliding above the sand before letting it out. _But are they ready for me?  
_

He wheezed out a laugh, staggering to the side. _Shinra’s finest monsters, created from chemicals and torture. My soul, corrupted by vengeance hath endured torment, to find the end of the journey...  
_

_...in my own salvation_...

“What salvation,” he muttered, gripping his sword tighter. “What fucking salvation...”

By the time he was about ten feet away from the line of soldiers, none of them moving, he finally stalled to a halt. “When will you fuckers give it up?” he taunted, scanning the ranks. “Ah, see that some of you decided to bring guns to a sword fight.” He pointed at the flanks, then swept his sword across the entire row, where he could level it with the barrels of shotguns. “Pretty shitty, if you ask me.”

“Where’s the rest of your platoon?” hollered the leader, judging by his more elaborate uniform and the sizable gun on his shoulder. “What is Shinra thinking, sending one unarmed grunt as bait?” 

_Oh, right._ Genesis glanced down at his uniform. _I took this, didn’t I?_ The thought made him laugh, and as he continued to swagger forward, head toward the sky, more guns loaded around him. “You think I’m unarmed?” he sneered. _“The wandering soul knows no rest”, so let’s get started._

One stride, and then two, and the third put him right nose to nose with the officer. His reflexes felt sluggish under the haze of smoke, but they were fast enough to react before the officer could even blink. In a single motion, Genesis sliced his sword across his neck, blood gleaming on the red blade, and watched him crumble to the ground. His gun fell unceremoniously by his side.

“And another thing,” Genesis muttered. In the corner of his eye, a terrified soldier aimed his gun at him, and he flicked his sword up to jam it through the edge of his chest. When he yanked it out, he tossed it up, giving him time to snake one arm out of his jacket, and then the other from his opposite, giving full view of his 1st-class black. He grinned at the army, outnumbering him at least 30 to 1. “I’m no fucking grunt.

“So? Are we going to play, or what?”

Gunfire split his ears, rattling him even through the stoned calm marijuana had blanketed on him. He rushed around to the side, slashing his sword through the outer perimeters, including cutting the hand off one unfortunate soldier. _Now this, this is what I was made for.  
_

_I’m a god made for murder._

_Who else? Could wield a sword like this..._

Genesis cut through another group of soldiers with one swing, three collapsing at his feet. A bullet whirred by his ear, and he ducked his head, vertigo forcing him to lunge forward. _These fools are child’s play. I don’t see any wings. I don’t see the blue in their scared eyes.  
_

His left shoulder itched, prickling beneath his uniform. _Better not get any blood on mine. It’s dirty enough as it is. Can’t fly with one broken wing._ His black feather earring beat on the side of his cheek as he sliced across the chest of another soldier, blood spraying onto his face. _When will I complete my set?_

_Never.  
_

He grit his teeth, and in the exhaustion building up in his arms, he felt a new surge of energy flood through him, fighting the lull of his high. _I’ll never be free, I’ll never fly. Even if I burned Shinra down to the ground myself, there’d still be someone ready to kill me._ His slashes turned to stabs, and now bullets were piercing his arms--the pain minute and chaste, but the blood drooling down his skin a lingering, heavy warmth. _Just let me drown in all this blood..._

_My own making..._

His eyes grew wider with each slash, until the butt of a gun hit him in the back of the head, forcing him to the ground. “Nice try,” he slurred, throwing his sword backward into the gut of the offending soldier. Red dripped past his eye. “Ha...haha...”

Genesis stayed on his knees, slashing at anyone who came near him, cutting through thighs and hips without hesitation. “You can’t...take me...” he mumbled. His blunt had burned to nearly nothing, finally dropping to the ground and leaving ash on his lips. “Dreams of the morrow hath the shattered soul...”

His speech dissolved into laughter, just as more gunshots rang out from beyond the horizon. _Pride is lost, pride is lost, pride is lost. What pride did I have? Do gods have pride?_ His vision doubled as he became surrounded by soldiers, and his efforts to thwart them dwindled. _Wings stripped away, stripped away, stripped away, the end is nigh_

_end is nigh_

_end is nigh_

_(my wings black as night sprout from my back and I fly above you all_

_I leave this pitiful world behind and create one of my own)_

_stripped away stripped away stripped away--_

A shadow passed over Genesis.

What caught his eye was a set of feathers, dangling from a belt as the owner’s enormous sword heaved beyond him, spacing him from the crowd. 

He panted on the ground, slowly, slowly glancing up 

_(white wings,  
_

_untainted,_

_better than mine...)_

at his relief. “You...” he muttered.

Angeal glanced down at him while he sheathed his sword on his back. “What are you doing?” he asked. He knelt down to his level, wiping the blood off his forehead with his thumb. “The lead 3rd told me you--” He wrinkled his nose. “Christ, Gen, you _reek_ of weed...”

“That’s how I like to do it,” Genesis snickered. “Thought you had other things to do.”

“Apparently not,” Angeal huffed, grabbing Genesis by the arm and looping it over his own, broad shoulders. “Apparently I’ve got _nothing_ better to do than to drag your ass around...”

“It’s a privilege,” he replied, leaning heavy against him. _Stripped away, stripped away, stripped away..._

_You got caught up in this too, didn’t you, Angeal? I dragged you off that stretcher, your arms looking just like mine and when you woke up,_

_instead of brown, glowing blue..._

“What happened to your armor?” Angeal asked as they made their way untouched through the battlefield. Bodies were strewn across the sands, and a mix of 3rds and 2nds were making their rounds along what was left of the army. 

Genesis snickered. “Left it behind. Borrowed some...some kid’s jacket.” 

“For fuck’s sake, you’re going to get yourself killed pulling this shit someday.”

“Seph can do it.”

“Sephiroth isn’t a _piece of shit_ like you are who gets _blazed_ before a critical mission,” Angeal hissed, glaring at him. “Honestly...”

“Would that be so bad, though?” he muttered as the base came into full view. The mako rush was beginning to fade, as was his high. He felt around in his belt, and sure enough, another blunt lie waiting for him. “Would it...be so bad...”

“Don’t,” Angeal said, tone dark and deep. He eased him down at the entrance and held him by both shoulders. _Oh, don’t. Don’t look at me like that,_ Genesis thought, scanning his tight jaw, the lines around his eyes, and the worry in his brow. _Don’t look at me like you care, for Christ’s sake,_

_that’s the last thing I need.  
_

“There should be someone in the infirmary,” Angeal muttered. “Get yourself patched up. And _don’t_ light up again.”

“Don’t tell me what to do.” Nonetheless, he slipped the blunt he’d grabbed from his belt back where it came from. 

Angeal crossed his arms. “Asshole,” he cursed, shaking his head. “I need to catch up with Fair. If you’re interested, Seph’s waiting on the roof.”

“On the roof? Fucker. Typical.” Genesis walked around Angeal, making a point to shove his side as he staggered forward. _Seph won’t get high with me right now, though, not like I want. He’ll wait ‘til after hours.  
_

_Guess I can wait.  
_

He scratched the back of his shoulder,

_(wings stripped away)_

 humming to himself once again. _“That’s why they call me...bad company, and I can’t deny.”_ _That’s me, that’s me. Bad news, bad company, a broken fucking god crammed into drug addled body.  
_

_Fuck it.  
_

_“Bad company, ‘til the day I die...”  
_

His laughter rang through the aluminum lined base. 


	4. Morning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This inspired chapter 20 of TAM, but as it stands, is non-canon.
> 
> Original publish date: 4/5/16, uploaded 6/27/16.

1997.

Zack was only mildly surprised to wake up with Cloud spooning him from behind. He squirmed gently out of his grip, sitting up as he readjusted himself in his sleep. _Probably a little lonely, huh? Being away from home and all that._ The bedroom door was open, and he squinted out into the living room, seeing no movement and hearing nothing besides Cloud’s gentle snoring. _Aerith must’ve already left. That’s all right._

He glanced back at Cloud, running a light hand over his hair. _That’s...all right._

The touch was enough to stir him, however, and he rolled over to his back, eyes barely open. “Z...Zack…?” he grumbled.

“Morning, sunshine,” he replied with a wink. “You were lookin’ pretty cozy, there.”

Cloud rubbed his eyes with the back of one arm and yawned. “I don’t...remember coming to bed,” he mumbled.

“You fell asleep on the couch while Aerith and I were…” _Having sex. Oops._ At least we weren’t too loud this time. “Well, y-y’know. You were there most of the night, but I remember Aerith bringing you in when she got up.”

Cloud blinked blearily. “She _carried me_ in here?”

“No, you walked in.” Zack bit back a grin. “You don’t remember?”

“No…” He sat up, his hair even more wild than usual, sticking out in odd places. “I must’ve still been asleep…”

He chuckled and stretched over to muss his hair further. “Well, it’s morning now, so rise and shine.” _Don’t gotta work too hard for that. You’re shining already._

_Ah…_

Zack bounced up out of bed and headed into the kitchen, his grin chasing him along with a heat along his cheeks. _I can’t believe I’m falling for my protege._ “Yo, do you want some coffee?” he called. _I almost kissed him back there, and I didn’t think anything of it. Just, the way he looks at me sometimes, is…_

“Sure,” Cloud called back.

_...it’s a lot._ Zack sighed to himself as he yanked two mugs from the cupboard, as well as the instant coffee and sugar bowl. _I mean, I’ve got a girlfriend already. Hell, I’ve got the ring. But I haven’t given it to her yet. I don’t know why._

With another yawn, Cloud trudged out from the bedroom, still sleepy, and wandered right over behind Zack, bumping his head against his back. “What time is it?” he said.

“9 o’clock? It’s not that early,” Zack replied, gripping the counter. “C’mon, you get up at 5 or 6 for drills, this can’t be that bad.”

“I need help,” Cloud groaned, grinding his head into his back.

Zack spun around, and Cloud barely budged, his head falling into his chest instead. _This does not help. This helps nothing._ “Well, lucky for you, I’ve got coffee to perk you up,” he said, poking his forehead with a finger in order to see his eyes. _Bright, bright blue._ “So, hang in there, ‘kay?”

Cloud squinted up at him, then shook his head, groaning as he plopped right back into his chest. “Hey…” Zack found his arm around his back, rubbing it as Cloud half dozed. _He must be really tired. This isn’t the kind of thing he’d normally pull...or maybe it’s just because we’re alone?_

_Come to think of it, we don’t hang out much alone except on base. And this sort of thing...probably wouldn’t fly._

Then, Cloud arms wrapped around his waist, and Zack’s heart fled into his throat. _Ah. This…_

Slowly, he returned it, resting his chin on top of his head. _This is nice. Is this what I’ve been wanting? All those time when he’s said, “thanks, Zack”, or “I really look up to you”, was it really meaning...something more?_

_I’ve got your back._

_Maybe that meant something more, too._

Zack squeezed him a little tighter, closing his eyes. _Maybe this is why I haven’t given her the ring. If she can have a crush on another girl...maybe I can have this, too._

_Maybe I will._

“Zack?” Cloud’s voice was muffled against his chest.

“Yeah?”

“Is...this okay?”

Zack smirked and lifted up his chin, making sure to meet his eyes. “Yeah. It’s okay.”


	5. Curfew

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original publish date: 7/20/16

1992.

3rd-class SOLDIER Zack Fair sneaked through the back entrance of Shinra HQ, right by the smoking area below the plate, and stormed up the stairs onto the 3rd floor. _I’m late, I’m late,_ he thought to himself as he slinked through the hallways, calling the elevator down. _Thank God no one’s around. If I’m lucky, the 2nd guard won’t be around and I can just sneak back into the barracks. Pretend I was...doing some training!  
_

He bounced on his toes in uniform, biting his lip. _Training, yeah. Training for...something._ He wiped his hand over his mouth, rubbing it as he did so. _Hope she didn’t get any lipstick on me. I haven’t gotten the chance to check.  
_

The elevator pinged for the 22nd floor, and he cursed the noise as he darted from the doors. The entire floor was dark, save for the light coming from the elevator and some emergency lights, and he took a deep breath and tried to keep a casual pace. _Nothing to see here, nope,_ he told himself, hands in his pockets as he scanned the hallway for his division number. _Just passing through, just--_

“3rd-class Fair.”

The voice was jarring and deep, and Zack nearly tripped over his own feet upon hearing it. He had almost made it to his barrack, hand on the door frame, when he turned toward the voice. “Oh, come _on,”_ he groaned, then squinted at the figure. _Is that...?_ “It’s not that late...”

“That’s not how you address your commanding officer.”

_Oh, shit._ “F-first-class Hewley, sir...”

Angeal’s boots were audible on the tile as he drew closer, dropping his voice. “What are you doing, Zack?” he scolded gently. “Past curfew on a _Thursday_ night?” 

“I-I lost track of time...” He scratched the back of his neck and shrugged. 

“You’re still in uniform, too.”

“Well...”

Angeal gave a very heavy sigh as he leaned against the wall. _Of course, it had to be Angeal on duty tonight,_ Zack thought, staring down at the floor. _Better than a Turk, I guess, but they’re nine-to-five’ers for the most part. Least from what I can see.  
_

“So?” Angeal asked. “Let me guess, were you trying to pick up a girl in town?” 

Zack blinked. “Wha--”

“I hear what you guys talk about, don’t think I don’t,” he said, a sour look pasted on his face. “They think that it’s easy to get laid once you’ve got that first taste of SOLDIER.”

_When you put it that way, it sounds like a bad thing. Ugh._ Zack huffed. “I was...” He rubbed the side of his cheek. “So what if I was? I just got dumped, anyway...”

“Dumped?” Angeal pushed himself off the wall. “Didn’t know you were dating anyone.”

“I’m not, just...” He pursed his lips. “Just a girl I’d met a few times at the same bar. Turns out she’s already got a boyfriend, and I was her ‘secret fling’.” 

__(”Don’t tell anyone.” Cherry red lips against his, breath laced with booze. “I’ve always wanted to sleep with a SOLDIER...”_ _

__“What do you mean by that?” he said, pulling away. The bar buzzed around them, unaware. “L-listen, babe, I’m not going to be your side fling if you’ve already got someone else--”_   
_

__She looked over him, then laughed. “I thought that’s what you came here for?” She rested her chin on her hand, a flicker in her eyes. “What, you weren’t looking for_ love _, were you?”)__

A weight rested on his chest. _Maybe not “love”, exactly, but something...something more than that..._

“That’s a shame,” Angeal said, with genuine sympathy. He patted Zack’s arm, drawing his attention back over. He offered him a smirk as he looked him over. “That isn’t the first I’ve heard of that, though.”

“Yeah?” 

He nodded. “Especially when you go out in uniform like that? SOLDIER is all people see, and all they care to. Whether it’s admiration...or fear.”

Zack bit the inside of his cheek. “Yeah...guess you’re right.” He shrugged and chuckled, dry. “Gets kinda lonely, that’s all, y’know? Just wish I had someone...to come home to, that’s all.”

Angeal tilted his head. “You’ve got friends here, right?”

“I mean, sure, but...it’s different. Know what I mean?”

Angeal looked off. “Huh. Sure.”

The yellow light from further down the hall cast a shadow through the hallway as they paused in silence. _Kissing a few girls in bars is different than having a girlfriend,_ Zack thought. _And after that...I feel lonelier than ever.  
_

_Admiration...or fear, huh? That’s how it is..._

_Hell, if I’m going to be honest, half the reason I joined was to show off to everyone back home. It was natural, everyone said, that I would go off to become SOLDIER. I had the strength, I had the drive...and the ego._ He shook his head to himself, glancing over to Angeal staring off into space. _Just...some things are different than I thought.  
_

Angeal clicked his tongue. “I’m going to have to write you up for this,” he remarked.

“What?” Zack exclaimed. “C’mon...”

“Rules are rules.” He raised an eyebrow. “You know what your punishment is.” 

_Yeah, hundred laps around the track, no breaks._ “C-can’t I...” he protested, “just...do it tomorrow?”

Angeal’s shoulders dropped as he fought off a smirk. “Fine, tomorrow morning. I’m holding you to it.”

_Whew._ A grin spread over Zack’s face. “Yes, sir...!” _Got out of that one._ “Hey, what are you even doing out on guard duty? Don’t you have your own place?” 

“That’s right,” he replied. “Wanted a...change of pace, I guess.” His sentence hung for a moment. “...And Genesis keeps blasting his music.”

Zack snorted. “Gotcha.” _That’s his childhood friend. I guess he’s a real card, judging what he’s said about him..._

“Forget about me, though,” Angeal said, pointing to the door between them. “Get to bed. You’ve got some running to do tomorrow.”

“Oh, don’t I know it,” he replied, twisting the handle as quietly as he could. It still made an audible click as the latch released, and he winced. “Night, Angeal.”

“Take it easy.” 

Angeal paced back down the hall just as Zack closed the door behind him, tiptoeing to his bed among the rest of his sleeping company. Gingerly, he undressed, even as his shoulder pads clattered on the ground, startling one of the snorers. _I’ll just sleep this off,_ he thought as he sat at the edge of the mattress. Moonlight shone through the single open window at the end of the room. _If I can sleep..._

_(”You weren’t looking for_ love, _were you?”)_

_(”You have friends, right?”)_

Zack pulled the scratchy sheets over his chest, covering his eyes with his arm. Drowsiness didn’t come easily.

* * *

 

Zack entered the rec room with a towel around his neck, wiping the sweat off his head. “Hey, Fair!” one of the SOLDIERs greeted, and as soon as he spoke up, a chorus of greeting erupted from the rest of the room. 

He grinned on instinct. “What’s happenin’, guys?” There were a few couches scattered around, as well as some folding chairs. A big-screen TV and a pool table also decorated the room, but Zack made a bee-line for the back, where a worn guitar case lay propped against the wall. 

“Hey, heard you got the run around for being out past curfew last night,” a voice behind him commented. “Did you get lucky?” 

Zack barked out a laugh as he dragged the case over to a chair that sat at the front of the room. “Nah, more _un_ lucky,” he remarked. He flipped the case open and withdrew the scratched acoustic, flicking his fingers across the strings. “After that, I’m staying in tonight.”

“That bad, huh?” The SOLDIER that first addressed him approached him at the chair. “That sucks, man.”

“Eh,” Zack shrugged, strumming a chord. The guitar was wildly out of tune, and he winced. _Shit, I should’ve just taken my own guitar from home the last time we had a holiday. It’s less temperamental than this hand me down._ He twisted the tuning keys in a vain attempt to get it to ring in a more pleasant tone. “It happens. You goin’ out with everyone, Kunsel?” 

“Not sure yet,” he replied. “You going to play for us?” 

“Just a little something.” Finally, the guitar sounded palatable enough to play chords against, and Zack rested his chest over the body of it. “A little tune I was listening to about...well, getting dumped.”

Kunsel snickered, then cupped his hands around his mouth. “Hey! Fair’s gonna sing!” 

A few whoops and hollers echoed around before the room faded to silence all eyes on him. “Hey, you didn’t have to do that--!” Zack insisted, even as his chest swelled with pride. _Well, I have an audience now. Might as well make the best of it._ He cleared his throat. “All right, here’s a song. This one’s called ‘Girls Can’t Wait’.”

He took a deep breath and played the intro riff, kicking back into the chair. _Who knows, maybe I’ll find a girl who’ll like me for more than SOLDIER. I can’t believe I’m even thinking that, it’s a card I use all the time. Zack Fair, SOLDIER 3rd-class._ He settled into a strumming rhythm, [then began to sing:](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zT0QGLLywuw)

_“It was dark and cool, she said I didn’t know all the rules,_  
She made her mind up fast, she took a walk and she didn’t come back.  
Girls can’t wait, girls can’t wait...” 

He smirked and shook his head, voice growing louder.

_“Everyone should know life ain’t no picture show,_  
You’ll lose your place in line, you’ll end up in life’s back row.  
Girls can’t wait, girls can’t wait...”

In the back of the room, he spotted Angeal standing in the doorway. He vamped the next couple chords, trying to stay in rhythm. “Yo!” he called out to him. He chuckled and offered him a two fingered salute. _Hell, maybe Angeal was right. I’ve got friends here. Maybe that’s good enough.  
_

_Good enough for now..._

_“Now I’m all alone, four empty walls and a telephone._  
All I know right now is girls can’t wait, girls can’t wait...”   


Zack furrowed his brow down at his fingering, picking a make-shift solo as best as he could. It still delighted his company, as he heard at least Kunsel cheer out as he played. Zack beamed at the strings. _Yeah, it’s fine for now.  
_

* * *

 

As Angeal watched Zack play from a distance, he felt a tap on his arm. “Who’s that?” Genesis muttered, bumping against his hip. “That your 3rd?” 

“Yeah, that’s Fair,” he replied, glancing down. “Why?” 

Genesis cupped a hand over his mouth. “He’s not bad,” he remarked.

“He’s not.” 

He smirked. “Think we could convince Seph to bring on another guitarist?”

“Doubt it,” Angeal snorted, stroking his goatee. “Maybe if he climbs a few ranks, but even then, he’d fuss.” 

“Oh, he’ll go down kicking and screaming.” 

Angeal curled his lip in exasperation as Genesis grinned. _I don’t know what you get out of this,_ he thought. “Give it time,” Genesis remarked. “I’ll wear him down. Pitch the idea to the kid sometime, though.”

He turned on one heel and strolled back out of the doorway and down the hall, hands in his pockets. _Yeah, I’ve thought about it,_ Angeal mused, _I just don’t want him to get mixed up with the likes of you until he’s a little less naive._

An eruption of applause drew his gaze back to the rec room, where Zack was glowing from the attention. “Thank you, thank you!” he acknowledged, bouncing in his chair. Angeal couldn’t help but smile quietly. _Then again, I don’t know if that’s anything he’ll really grow out of._


	6. Something New [NSFW]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains sexually explicit content, reader discretion advised. As this takes place within the time frame of the fic, it sits somewhere shortly after chapter 31 (shortly after Zack and Cloud get together).
> 
> Original publish date: 4/2016, uploaded 8/2/16

1997.

“You ready?”

Zack was on his knees on the bed, naked, head under a couple pillows, while Aerith hovered behind him. “Ready as I’ll ever be,” he sighed. “I know you really wanna go with that thing, but will you _please_ start slow?”

She adjusted the strap-on against her crotch. “Yes, sweetie, I will.”

“Please be kind to my ass. It’s the only one I’ve got.”

She massaged it, spreading his cheeks and edging the lubed dildo right up against his asshole. “Oh, I will,” she murmured, and slowly pushed it in.

_“Ohh…”_ he sighed, immediately balling the sheets around him in his fists. “Oh, _my God,_ you’re... _ahh…”_

“I’m not even all the way in yet.” She pushed further, just a little further, and it felt full and tight inside him. “Is it nice?”

“It’s.. _.haah_...something…” he panted, hand already wandering down to his own cock, stroking its hard length in his hand. “Do...do you... _mnn_...feel like this every time?”

“Depends.” He felt it pull out a little, then edge back in, a rhythm beginning to pick up. “There, is this good enough for you?”

“That works,” he huffed, eyes fluttering shut as he drooled against the pillow. With every undulation, he moaned faintly, letting the heat spread up through his thighs and warm the rest of his body. _God, I could get used to this,_ he thought, listening in to her quiet moans as she gripped his hips. _Ah…_

“Ugh,” she grunted, shuffling something underneath him. “When are we going to make this bed? There’s always so much stuff on it…”

“S-someday,” Zack panted, scooting up a little bit to look back at her with a little smile. “N-not...not now... _ah!”_

She brought him back sharp, the sensation sending electricity through his entire body. “O-oh... _hmmn_...goin’ faster...huh? _Haaah…”_

“I don’t hear you _nearly_ as much as I’d like,” she said with a smirk, then bent over his back, kissing all down his spine. “Won’t you moan for me, sweetie~?”

_“Oh, babe…”_

Aerith’s pace against his ass had quickened considerably, as was his own stroking, and he felt sweat start to bead against his brow. _“Haah...ahhn…” Funny, the more noise I make...the hotter I get…_

_If she keeps this up…_

_Damn, if...ah...I’m…_

_I’m not going to be able to hold back…_

“Are you close~?” she teased.

“I-I... _aah...haahn…”_ His moans were heightening in pitch, every breath a gasp as his cock throbbed in his palm. _“Sss...a-aah...AAAH!”_

The orgasm took him off guard as she pushed herself in all the way, and he couldn’t catch it all in his palm, cum drooling out of his hand and down below him. _“Aah...hah_...shit...I...gonna... _ugh.”_

“How was that?”

He flopped down onto the sheets--or, at least what he _thought_ was the sheets, until he felt a plastic-like, slippery material under his chest. “Good,” he replied, then finally opened his eyes. “Oh, _fuck.”_

Aerith pulled out of him slowly to kneel forward and hug him around the waist. “What? What’s wrong?” An edge of panic ebbed in her tone, despite her flushed cheeks.

Zack sat up and back on his rear, gesturing in front of him. “I came all over his jacket.”

Below them was Cloud’s coveted windbreaker, in all of its purple and bright colored glory, streaked with the result of Zack’s orgasm. “Oh,” Aerith said, a hand over her mouth. “Can’t you just...wash it?”

“It got into the collar, too…” Zack held it up, the cum already starting to seep through the thin fabric. “Fuck, he’s going to kill me…”

“Cloud would not kill you,” Aerith assured. “He nearly kisses the ground you walk on.”

“But this is his favorite jacket,” he said, shaking it. “I mean, we can try and wash it, but he’s going to be looking for it…”

“Just tell him that--”

A knock at the door. “Guys?”

“Shit!” Zack whispered, then shouted. “Yeah? What is it, man?”

“Have you seen my jacket? I can’t find it anywhere.”

Aerith doubled over, face down on the bed as she tried to stifle her laughter. “Uh, it’s...uh…” he fumbled. _Come on, think! Think!_ “I...took it down to wash, I think it’s still in there.”

“Oh…”

“But, you know what you can do,” Zack continued slowly. “You...can wear one of mine. Dig in the closet ‘til you find something you like.”

Cloud’s voice brightened considerably. “Okay! Thanks!”

Zack listened for his footsteps to walk away from the door before he buried his face into Aerith’s hair. “Dodged a fucking _bullet,”_ he muttered, shaking his head.

“You’re gonna have to make it up to him,” she said, her face completely pink from the blood rushing to it. “After you clean up--don’t get your sticky mess in my hair!”

“Ack, sorry, babe…!” 


	7. Case File 021091

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original publish date: 8/4/16

1997.

With the gala bustling in the gymnasium, the rest of Shinra HQ was quiet, void of even the most dire of workaholics. However, there was one office on the 40th floor with its lights on, even if it was just a lamp. 

Tseng opened filing cabinet after filing cabinet, shuffling through folders of files, thumbing through dates. _How many years has it been?_ he thought, a crease in his brow. _It’s been long, but not...terribly so. Five? Six?  
_

_I never thought I’d see that girl again.  
_

A knock echoed on the door. “Tseng?” a woman’s voice echoed. She poked her head through the door, and when he didn’t reply right away, she entered with a click of her heels. Her sleek, blonde bob was meticulously arranged without a hair out of place, and her blue, form-fitting dress sparkled in the lamp light. “The gala is still going, what are you doing here?”

_Elena._ “I’m looking for something,” Tseng muttered. _Besides, those galas give me headaches, with all the noise._ He rubbed his temple as he glanced over to his desk. _I have aspirin somewhere..._

“For what?” she persisted. Her eyes were sharp, scanning everywhere. “Was there something suspicious downstairs, or--”

“No, no, nothing like that, it’s...” he replied, turning his head profile so he could get a glimpse of Elena from his peripheral. _She’s always been on top of things. She’ll be a good candidate to take my place someday, with how dedicated and...diligent she is._ “I just...saw something. I want to be sure.” 

"Saw what?” 

“Something from an old case file.”

“Which file?”

_Christ._ “Something from long before you were here,” Tseng sighed. He was forced to spin in his chair to face her. “Why don’t you go enjoy the party?”

“I...” She bit her lip, rubbing the side of her bare arm. “All right. Don’t take too long. The others have noticed too.”

“I’m sure.” 

She paused for a moment more, expecting more of an explanation. When it didn’t come, she huffed and backed up. “Well, good luck with whatever you’re looking for,” she said.

Tseng stayed still until he heard the door close behind him. _Nosy. Still, I guess it’s comforting. This isn’t the first time I’ve snuck off, but it’s not often that someone comes looking for me._

As soon as her footsteps echoed away from the door, he pulled out a thin manila folder simply labeled “021091″. Clattering the cabinet closed, he flipped it open and smoothed it out on his desk.

_So, six years. February 10, 1991.  
_

_It was bitter cold..._

_(”Seems cruel to do this sort of thing in the winter,” Reno sighed, hands stuffed in his thick jacket and a cigarette smoking from the side of his mouth. “If there’s anyone left in that house...”_

_“Remind me what our goal is?” Tseng asked._

_Rude, walking on the opposite side of Reno, answered for him. “Seize the house,” he muttered. “The woman who rented it is gone, presumed dead, but her daughter might be there. If she is, she goes to the labs.”  
_

_Reno winced, spitting out the filter, but said nothing...)_

Tseng ran his fingers over the overdue lease forms, front and center. _Ifalna Gainsburough, 37, living in Shinra subsidized housing in Sector 1. Rumors turned into confirmation that she was a sex worker, catering to some elites to pay for her rent and to support her child. And then...nothing for three months._ He flipped the lease over, revealing two photographs paper-clipped to an eviction notice. The top photo was of a woman with long, flowing hair and eyes that seemed to glitter, even in the grainy black and white finish. _Foul play was suspected..._

_(”Must be slow if they’re sending us to take care of this,” Tseng said as they reached the door.  
_

_“She was wrapped up with some Shinra elites, of course they’d send us.” Reno shrugged, rapping his cane against the door three times. “Then again, SOLDIER recruits are down. It’s Dr. You-Know-Who that requested the girl.” He glanced over to Tseng with an oddly haunted look. “They want fresh blood.”  
_

_“Terrible,” Tseng muttered with a grimace, steam accompanying his consonants.  
_

_“The science department lost a lot during the last round of...AIDS experimentation,” Rude remarked, hesitating on the acronym. “Only a handful of 2nds made it...”  
_

_“It’s been a few years though, hasn’t it?” Tseng asked. “Those couple of 2nds should be 1sts by now--”  
_

_“I said the_ last _round, not the most notable one.”_

_“So he’s going to grab orphans off the street?” Reno hissed, knocking again. “Fucking Christ, something ain’t right about that...”  
_

_“We have to do our job. Or else we’ll be next. He’s never been picky.”)_

Tseng thumbed the portrait up to reveal the one underneath. _That was certainly true. Hasn’t changed since then, unfortunately._ This picture was of a girl, similar in face, but with bushier hair and rounder cheeks than the previous one. _Aerith Gainsburough, 15 at the time. She stayed on her own for all those months.  
_

_Rude wanted to break the door down, but I picked the lock. The house looked lived in, but after checking the cupboards, there was nearly no food left._ He flipped the next page, where Shinra’s logo stood out in dark red amongst the black typewriter print. His eyes glazed at the details of the report, picking them up in bits and pieces. _School papers still around. House abandoned. No one there.  
_

_Except..._

_(”Tseng, go check the back bedroom.”  
_

_Down the hall, the door was closed. It opened with a creak, he had to push clothes and blankets out of the way to get through. It didn’t seem that there was much in there, but everything in the bedroom was on the floor. Tseng held his breath and listened closely--yes, that was the sound of someone else’s shuddered breathing, and he traced it to the foot of the bed, facing the back wall.  
_

_A crouched figure, shrouded in a blanket. The closer he stepped, the more it tensed, until he knelt before it. “Aerith?” he whispered.  
_

_She sniffled, parting the blanket aside. Bony knees tucked up to her chest in overalls, bushy ponytail mashed to the side of her face, her green eyes were like saucers. Tseng could barely see her hands fidget just below her knees, but the light caught an iridescent stone twirl within them. “Where’s Mom?” she asked quietly. “Did you take her away?”)_

The report went to the back side, signed by both himself and a stamp from the president of the company. _I didn’t have the heart to answer her. It was easy for me to put the pieces together--she said no, didn’t give them what they wanted...and they killed her. Or, perhaps she went to the labs, and that’s why Hojo was so eager to get his hands on her daughter._ He ran a hand down over his mouth, gripping the sides of his cheeks. _I wonder if she knew, in a way._

_Given how terrified she looked..._

_(”Tseng! Found anything?” Rude called from down the hall._

_A split second’s hesitation. “Nothing,” he called back, adrenaline spiking in his heart before he turned back to her, voice barely a whisper. “Stay hidden. Once we’re gone, leave as soon as you can.”  
_

_Her throat clicked, as if she wanted to speak, but nothing came out. Instead, she nodded.  
_

_“I’m serious. Take what you can and leave.” He swallowed. “Otherwise--”  
_

_Footsteps from down the hall, and he stood up just in time for Rude to poke through. “What a mess,” he muttered. “Guess it’s what you get when you don’t have someone telling you to clean your room for a couple months...”  
_

_Tseng’s heart pounded as he stood right in front of Aerith, shielding her from view. “Right,” he said. He kept his breathing even, a blanket of faux calm over his features. “There’s nothing in here. She must have already left.”  
_

_The seconds between Rude’s surveying and his next words were long, arduous, palpable. “Nothing we can do about that.” He cracked his knuckles and sighed, turning away. “Looks like Hojo will have to find some other volunteers...”  
_

_Tseng took two measured steps forward, then paused. Despite the urge, he didn’t look back, and kept walking...)_

The next document in the folder was an itemized list: handwritten, with some things marked in orange highlighter. _I stopped by the place two days later, and she had taken my advice. In hindsight, I should have given her a place to go. Three blocks into Sector 2 there is an orphanage. But, there wasn’t any time. I would’ve been caught, we would’ve had to give her up, and she would’ve been another experiment.  
_

_And then, part of me always wonders if I should have taken her myself.  
_

He shook his head as he flipped through the stapled list. _No, no, it would’ve been pointless. _Rumors would’ve spread, I would have been questioned incessantly_ , and besides, I don’t have time to be a father. And there would always be the risk..._

_(”Dr. Crescent!” a young intern exclaimed as she approached her. “You’re...didn’t you just have your baby?”  
_

_She offered her a thin lipped smile. “There was...a mishap,” she said.  
_

_“Oh, no...I’m so sorry to hear...”)_

Tseng reached for the aspirin on the edge of his desk and shook two out. _I didn’t understand then--me, an eavesdropping teenager, not even qualified to wear the proper uniform, but...I do now.  
_

He swallowed the pills dry, wincing as the bitter tablets dissolved halfway down his throat. _They sent a different group of general military to clean the house a week later. Most of the belongings were burned, some were kept. And I never saw Aerith Gainsburough again..._

_Until tonight, when she was arm in arm with 1st-class Fair.  
_

He leaned back in his chair and closed the file. _I thought it was my imagination, seeing glimpses of her around base. I was tempted to ask one of the other 1sts how long they’ve been dating, but it would have raised concern, I am not the type to gossip.  
_

_I just..._

In his suit pocket, his pager beeped. He withdrew it slowly, despite the shrill, annoying sound, and clicked it. _“Stop working and get down here!”_ Reno’s voice burst through the tinny speaker, and was silenced as quickly as it started. Tseng shook his head and pocketed the pager once again. _Fine. There’s nothing more I need to see here.  
_

_But, I am glad she’s safe._


	8. Nightmares

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The second part of this short takes place sometime right before the events of TAM take place.
> 
> Original publish date: 10/8/16

1990.

As soon as the 3rd-class barracks were silent and still, Genesis broke it with the flick of a lighter. _Always around this time,_ he thought. _1 AM is when it’s finally quiet._ He slipped a blunt from his belt and lit the end, taking a deep drag immediately. _And good thing, too. My buzz from my last break was...just wearing off.  
_

_Ah..._

He waved the smoke cloud away that erupted from his nose and leaned heavily against the doorframe. _Can’t wait ‘til I don’t have to do fuckin’ barracks patrol anymore. It’s late nights and boring shit. Are they so afraid that these guys are going to sneak out, or something?_ Orange light glowed from the tip of the blunt as he sucked on it again. _I mean, they’ve already gotten a taste of what these bastards can do for them. Bright eyed kids, coming in to prove their worth, their “honor”  
_

_(just like us, once upon a time)_

_but in the end, there’s nothing._ He blew another line of smoke out toward the hallway. _Fuckin’ nothing. They turn you into monsters, into murder machines, hell, I think this group’s already seen death--_

“N-nn...nnn...”

Whimpering from inside the barracks chilled Genesis right through his core, dispelling the high that was beginning to cloud his mind. _Oh, great,_ he thought. He shook the ash off the end and crushed it out with his boot, before sticking the blunt behind his ear and peering into the doorway. _Some kid’s got fuckin’ night terrors..._

“Nnn...M-mom, n-no...”

He traced the sound all the way to the back--none of the other 3rds were stirring--where a long bundle of blankets shook in the cot. The moonlight streamed in through the window, illuminating the SOLDIER’s long, silver hair spilling over him. Genesis’ eyes widened. _This...this is..._

He swallowed and shook him by the shoulders. “Hey. Cetra. Wake up,” he muttered. _“Sephiroth.”_

Sephiroth woke with a start, sitting straight up in the bed and almost knocking Genesis over. His eyes were wide, with a bare trace of mako glow in them, sweat beading on his brow. “Fuck,” he panted, running a shuddering hand through his hair. 

_What would Angeal say in a situation like this?_ Genesis thought as he watched Sephiroth’s Adam’s apple bob in his throat. “Take...take it easy,” he settled on. “Nightmare?” 

Composure came after another cycle of heavy breathing, and his features smoothed in a facade of calm. _Sephiroth Cetra,_ Genesis mused. _I trained him when he was a standard, and do some work with him now. We’ve gotten high...a few times together. He gets into it._ He hid a smirk. _Hell yeah, he does. Maybe someday...I can make a move._ Genesis’ eyes dipped along his neck, where his loose t-shirt left his collarbone exposed. _He’s pretty hot.  
_

If Genesis was obvious, Sephiroth didn’t acknowledge it. “Yes,” he said. He looked up and out the window. “I’m fine.”

“Really.” Genesis shifted his weight on his feet. _And he’s tough, all right. One of the first SOLDIER I’ve seen that showed no side effects from mako. Maybe if I hadn’t been so impressed by it, he wouldn’t have been taken away like he was._ He bit the inside of his cheek. 

_(”Where is he?!” he bellowed, brandishing his blood red rapier at the president’s desk. “What did you do with him?!”  
_

_Rufus Shinra sighed, pinching the nerve between his eyes. “Put that away, 1st-class Rhapsodos.”  
_

_“Don’t fucking patronize me, you bastard! I know what you do here--_ we _know what you do here! You fucking poisoned us, you little shits! Ugh, let fucking GO OF ME--”)_

_In the end, he was fine. So we think, anyway. And he’s gunning for 1st too, of course. Angeal told me that he’s the best in his barracks, that he’ll be ready for 2nd any day now. That’s wild. He’s barely 20, not even...then again, who am I to talk, running away at fucking 16, 17--  
_

_("Gen, you know you don't have to do this 'cause I am--"_

_"So what? I wanna."_

_"Do you? Do you_  really?"

_"The hell else am I gonna do? Smoke myself out in my own room 'til I suffocate?" Genesis laughed before slamming the pen down on the recruiter's desk. "Come to think of it, might be fun…"_

_Angeal rolled his eyes, adjusting his backpack over his shoulder…)_

Silence had settled between them in Genesis’ musings, and he absently picked the blunt from his ear to rest it between his lips. “You want to talk about it?” he asked. 

“No,” Sephiroth replied. 

Genesis raised an eyebrow, then pointed to the blunt. “You want a hit?” 

He curled his lip. “No,” he said again. “Not...not now.” 

“It’ll help you sleep.” He chuckled deep in his chest, and despite the urge, refrained from taking a drag himself. “Later?” he pushed. “My place, tomorrow?” 

He took a moment to reply, as if he was rolling the idea around. “I guess,” he sighed. 

_Nice,_ Genesis thought with a grin. “Cool,” he said. He stood up and looked around--despite the small commotion, none of the others had woken up. “See if you can get some sleep.” _I’ll be around. I’ll be right in that fuckin’ doorway if you get spooked again. I heard you calling for your mom, do you miss her? Did you have some bloody dream that looks too much like what you’ve already seen on some desert battle field?_

_I’ll be around.  
_

In the end, he spoke none of his thoughts. 

“Okay,” Sephiroth said. He scooted back down under his sheets and rolled over. “Night, Genesis.” 

Angeal’s exasperated voice echoed in his head. _That’s 1st-class Rhapsodos to you,_ he mused. _That’s what he’d say. But, Sephiroth has never addressed anyone by their rank. And besides, we know each other outside of this hellhole, so...what’s the point, really?  
_

Taking slow steps backward, Genesis took a hit deeper than he had all evening. “Night,” he whispered, through a cloud of smoke. 

* * *

 

1997.

“Seph? Sephiroth...”

Hands on his shoulders stirred him, and he squinted to read the output from his alarm clock. _2 AM?_ he thought, adjusting his eyes to the dark. _What...?  
_

Standing at the side of his bed was Loz in a t-shirt and boxers. “What is it?” Sephiroth groaned, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hand. _This had better be worthwhile. It better not be Kadaj getting into my shit._ “What...”

“I heard something down the hall,” Loz said. “I think it was coming from your friend’s place.”

_Genesis?_ “What did it sound like?” _  
_

“Sounded like crying.”

_Jesus._ He ripped the covers off himself and hastily rummaged through his dresser for a pair of pants. “Fine. I’ll see to it,” he muttered. “Go back to sleep.”

Grabbing a hairtie from his dresser, he pushed past Loz as he tied his hair up into a ponytail and rushed through the living room. _I wonder what it is now,_ he thought. Sephiroth snatched his keys and fled out of the apartment, remembering at the very last second that it was indeed two in the morning, and caught the door before it slammed behind him. He tuned his ear in the hallway--coughing sobs, muffled by thin walls and perhaps a pillow, echoed inside. He shook his head and walked the short distance to Genesis’ door. 

First, he tried the handle, but the deadbolt caught him. _Damn it._ He knocked just loud enough to be sharp, knuckles against the wood. The crying ceased. _At least I got his attention._ With a sigh, he knocked again. “Gen, it’s me.”

Sephiroth crossed his arms and waited. A minute passed, then two. When he was about to knock again, the deadbolt clicked, and Genesis stood before him, blotchy faced with watery eyes. “The fuck?” he choked, sniffling. 

_God Christ, you’re a mess._ “Loz heard you,” he stated, clicking his tongue. 

Genesis curled his lip and looked away. “I’m fine. Forget it. I was just going back to sleep.”

Sephiroth squinted at him. _That’s not what it sounded like. “Nightmare?”_ he asked.

He sighed so deeply it moved his bare back and shoulders. “Yup,” he replied. “I’m coming off a...bad trip, too. Trying to get rid of my shrooms before I’m dispatched.”

“Why?” 

“I don’t know how long they’re gonna keep me out there, fuck.” He sloppily pushed his bangs back with the end of his palm. “God _damn it,_ I f-feel...queasy...”

“You idiot,” Sephiroth snorted. _Imagine, I thought of him as a mentor, once upon a time. When I was young, and didn’t know any better. When I was younger and barely got any respect from those around me, save for my foster mother. While he was my senior, he recognized my strength. Even if he was--no, is--like this.  
_

_I simply did not know the scope of it.  
_

“You’re not really going back to sleep,” Sephiroth continued. “Let me in.” 

Genesis opened his mouth to protest, then bowed his head and swept his arm to the side. “Be my fuckin’ guest,” he grumbled. His voice still held a watery quality, and he wiped his nose with the back of his other hand. “The night isn’t getting any younger.” 

Sephiroth raised his eyebrows as he stepped in, twirling his keys in his hand. _Yes, and neither are you. I’ve tripped with you before, you don’t hold back whatsoever._ He watched as Genesis staggered around to his red beanbag chair, collapsing and running a hand down over his face. _Only you would pull an idiot stunt like this..._

_...but if it’s nightmares that wake you up, with fear so gripping you sound like that, then..._

Sephiroth sat beside him, cross-legged on the floor. “Do you want to talk about it?” he asked quietly.

Genesis looked him right in the eye, then snickered. “No,” he replied.


	9. Christmas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original publish date: 10/18/16

2007.

Cloud rubbed his eyes as he worked by the light of the Christmas tree, wash of multi-colored string lights casting a reddish glow on the modest pile of presents before him. _That’s almost...all of them,_ he thought with a yawn. _Oh, shit, but the stockings..._

The electric fireplace was crowded with empty, red felt stocking--each with names carefully written on in glitter glue. _Aerith’s idea,_ he thought with a smirk. _She even did cursive on them. Ugh, but where did we store all the stocking stuff? It had better not be in our bedroom._

_“_ Hon?” _  
_

Cloud jerked up, squinting at the shadow in the doorway. “Zack...”

He chuckled, scratching his bare chest before kneeling beside him. “Playing Santa?” he remarked, kissing his cheek. 

“Thought I’d do it now...” Cloud replied, leaning his head on his shoulder. “I know, you wanted to do it early in the morning, but who knows how early Rosie’s going to be up--”

“You _just_ got back from your shift though, right?” Zack rubbed his back. “Baby, it’s 3 in the morning. You’re allowed to get some sleep...” 

“But...” He sighed, trying to keep his voice down. His left thumb reached for his ring finger, where a simple band rested, and he ran it along the metal. “I-it’s easier, isn’t it?” 

“Oh, you...” Zack ruffled his hair and kissed it. “C’mon, I’m up. I’ll help you. What’s left, stockings?” 

“God, you don’t have to--”

“Shh.” Zack hushed him with a kiss on his lips, one that Cloud sank into almost immediately. _He kisses me…just the same as when we first got together. It’s been...a while now. A lot’s happened.  
_

_But...we haven’t changed. Or if we have, we’ve done it together.  
_

Reluctantly, he broke the kiss, but stayed close to his face. “Do you know where that stuff is?” Cloud asked. “I...I forgot where we were keeping it...”

“In the computer room,” he replied, and took his hand. 

They stood up, and Zack led them down the dark hallway into the side room. He winced when the door creaked as it opened. _We were lucky to get this house out here in Edge. Aerith was probably the most excited--it’s still modest for what it is, but 3 whole bedrooms. Even Ti and I had nothing like this back home._ Zack flicked on the lamp, revealing a desk with a computer set up on it, along with an overstuffed chair in the back. On it, was a cardboard box, stuffed with packages wrapped in tissue paper. “Here we go,” Zack said, taking it in his arms. 

“Is it all labeled?” Cloud asked, standing on his toes to peer in.

“Don’t matter,” Zack grunted. “Most of this stuff’s for the kids, anyway. Go on.”

Cloud got a head start in front of Zack, and smiled to himself. “That’s what Christmas is for, isn’t it?” he commented. “I remember after I was in high school, I started getting only one present a year. Then we just did family dinners.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Zack rummaged through the boxes, and began sorting through the gifts, popping them into their respective stockings. Cloud cocked his head and watched him work. _Yeah, it was your idea for most of these presents, wasn’t it?_ he thought. _Ti and I never had big Christmases…but Denzel had spent enough time in the orphanage, so we spoiled him. Then Rosie came along, and you couldn’t help but spoil your little girl…even Aerith couldn’t stop you.  
_

_Rosie’s probably dreaming about Santa and his reindeer right now.  
_

“God, Rosie’s stocking’s _stuffed,”_ Zack chuckled, patting the top of it. It was bulging from all that was in it, including a stuffed penguin perched right at the top. “She’s gonna be so excited...” 

He paused, then glanced between the stocking labeled “DENZEL”, much less full than hers. “You think he’s going to be upset?”

“I don’t think so,” Cloud replied. “He’s older, he’s always been...good about stuff like that. Plus--” He chuckled to himself as he pointed to a long box standing up near the back of the tree. “--Shinra’s Finest got him something.”

Zack’s mouth formed a small “O” as he looked it over. “No shit,” he exclaimed. “Betcha it’s a guitar or something. Damn, Seph...” _  
_

Cloud ran a hand over his face, but was unable to wipe the smirk that was there. “So, he’ll like that.” _Denzel’s never been demanding, though. He’s been a good kid. Quiet, accepting, always trying to find ways to help around the house. He even got a job this past summer. And then, he..._

_(”Dad?” Denzel asked over a bowl of cereal. “Um, at school the other day...they were handing out recruitment forms for SOLDIER.”  
_

_Cloud’s chest tightened, and he and Aerith exchanged a look. “Yeah?” he said simply._

_Denzel wouldn’t meet his eyes, gripping his spoon. “I was...ah...”  
_

_He hesitated, and Aerith dipped her head. “Were you thinking about signing up?” she coaxed quietly._

_With a heavy sigh, he nodded, and Aerith bit her lip. “Well, why don’t you…take a little time to think about it?“ She met Cloud’s eyes again in quiet agreement. “You’re only 16 still...”)_

Zack shook his head, picking up the box of gifts, now empty, and flipped it over in his hands. “He takes after you,” he said with a wink.

Cloud only nodded. _Sure does._ He bit the inside of his cheek. _Especially…since when she said “you’re only 16″, he replied with “almost 17″. We haven’t talked too much about what happened to me when I first joined…and even if we did, would that deter him? Nothing deterred me…_

_And even though I went through hell, if I didn’t, I wouldn’t be here with all of them.  
_

Cloud yawned again, and was greeted with Zack’s arms hugging him from behind, laced around his waist. “C’mon, babe,” he murmured. “The ladies are sleeping upstairs. Let’s go to bed.” 

He twisted in his grip, running his hands up his shoulders, then wrapped them around his neck. “Okay,” he replied. “Zack...”

“Hm?” 

Cloud stared into his deep blue eyes, barely illuminated by the light of the tree. “I love you.”

Zack grinned, and kissed his forehead. “Love you too.”

* * *

 

“Dezzie?” 

The voice was high and faint, and Denzel stirred, rolling over in his bed. He squinted at the barely open door, where his sister Rosie stood in her nightgown. “What’s up?” he croaked, voice cracking. 

Her bushy hair bounced as she glanced behind her, then back into his room. “I thought I heard...something downstairs,” she said. 

_Something downstairs?_ he thought. _Ah, they must be getting the presents ready. Dad had to work a night shift, anyway..._ “Maybe it’s Santa,” he suggested.

She gasped. “Really?” Rosie rushed to the side of his bed and pulled on the sheets. “C’mon, c’mon! I wanna see--”

“Shh...” he hushed, sitting up. “Santa won’t bring you presents if you spy on him.”

She clapped her hand over her mouth. “Oh.” 

Denzel clumsily patted her head. “Go back to bed, Rosie. It’s real late.”

“But I don’t wanna! I wanna see Santa...”

“I’ll tell Tifa.” _Mom will pick her up and drag her back in bed, and not too happily...I remember she was always the one who got pissed when she started crying in the night as a baby.  
_

Even in the dark, Denzel could sense her pout. “Aw...mm’kay. Nuh-night.”

“Night.” 

She toddled back out of the door, and the house went quiet once again as Denzel settled into the sheets. _That was easy. When I was at the orphanage, they didn’t really…play that game with us. We all had stockings, and there’d be some socks for us. I remember our first Christmas together here, Zack freaked out when I told him. Looking back on it now, they went a little overboard..._

He sighed as drowsiness began to take him over. _I was just happy to be with a family._

* * *

 

_And he says, “All I want is for you to have a life you love and live.  
“Take from me all I have to give--because you are in my heart.”_

”The Man Who Would Be Santa”, Vertical Horizon, _Running On Ice_


	10. Lab Diary

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original publish date: 1/24/17

August 29, 1997--

By the end of his life, Hojo had few redeemable qualities. When I married him, I admired his strong will, and his dedication to his work. But, I didn’t know him well enough. I didn’t know what his real ambitions were. I wasn’t close enough to his actual work. And he was so fascinated by me that I…

I just fell into it.

I never expected to get married, or anything like that. But he was courteous enough through our courtship that I just…accepted it. He was beginning to make breakthroughs, and earning a lot of money, while my salary had been stagnant since my first promotion. I thought it was a safer bet. I had a nagging in the back of my mind. Maybe this wasn’t the right choice. But, by the time the incident with Vincent happened, God forgive me, and by the time I was pregnant…it was already too late. 

He was terrifying when he was angry. And he was always persistent. He would not stop until he got his way, especially when it came to his work. And he made me and my body part of it. I had no choice but to let him experiment on the baby in utero. I thought about trying to escape then, but…he would have hunted me down. 

When the child was born, Hojo was displeased. Something hadn’t gone to his plan. He wanted to sacrifice him to the labs, dissect him. I thought about trying to escape again, but…it would have had the same results. I had to be more clever. If I could not get away from him…I would make sure my child, who had barely opened his eyes, would. 

I told Hojo that I had sent him to the labs. I falsified reports. And in the evening, I took the baby deep under the plate to an orphanage. I named him, and left him. And despite my guilt, I sent a letter to Vincent with the name of the baby, hoping someday…someday he would be safe. 

Over two and a half decades…but, I’m reminiscing. 

I felt no remorse at his funeral. Instead, I felt immense relief, and the guilt that comes with it. Finally, I would no longer have to tread so lightly, have to keep things under such tight control…could you imagine my shock, when I saw my son’s name come up in the SOLDIER roster? And how quickly he made 1st class? I had to reroute so many tests, skim through analysis, just so that it wouldn’t reach Hojo, and he wouldn’t end up like Vincent did…or worse. 

But Hojo is gone now, and I can finally take my time. 

Hojo had few redeemable qualities, but despite his experimentation on me all those years ago…Sephiroth wasn’t a failure. In fact, if he weren’t so rash to judge, he could claim him as a tremendous success. But he can’t, and he won’t. He doesn’t deserve the credit.

With the blood samples I have, I can get started on cultivating at least one vaccine, perhaps the most important one--HIV and AIDS. It is a full immunity, nothing like I’ve ever seen before. It will take a lot of work, and a lot of testing…but this means I can stop the epidemic. It’s an exciting breakthrough, especially if it works. No more placebos from interns to placate the public while Hojo works on his monsters…nothing like that. 

I don’t know whether I should tell Sephiroth the truth. It seems he was adopted by a family that he loves…so would it make any difference? I have gotten used to working behind the scenes…perhaps it would be best to stay that way. 

Sephiroth, I’m glad you’ve grown up safe and strong. It’s one small thing that eases my heart. 


	11. The First Incident

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original publish date: 2/1/17

1997.

At three in the afternoon, in the middle of his third coffee of the day, Tseng heard a knock on his door. “Come in,” he said. 

Rufus Shinra opened the door and nodded. “Ah,” Tseng said, taking a last sip of his coffee and set it aside. “Mr. President.”

He waved his hand. “Just dropping something off,” he said, offering a folder to the growing pile on Tseng’s crowded desk. “Nothing urgent. Maybe something one of your junior recruits can tend to.”

“That’s fine,” Tseng replied, studying Rufus. “Just surprised to see you running errands.”

He chuckled. “Not much to do on a Wednesday afternoon. In the middle of a sleepy summer…” He put his hands in his pockets and stared out the window behind the desk. “Maybe I should have scheduled a vacation. I just hate the tourist mob.”

“There’s still time,” Tseng said.

“You say that like you’ve taken a vacation in the last decade,” he retorted. 

Tseng ignored this. “At any rate…there was something I wanted to ask you--”

He didn’t shut the door behind him, and the normal quiet of the hallway was disrupted by thundering footsteps down the hall. Nearly skidding to a halt in front of the door, Elena swung through the doorway with a plastic bag in her hand. “Sir--!” she said breathlessly. Upon spotting Rufus, she immediately straightened herself like a board. “M-Mr. President!”

“At ease, Elena,” Tseng sighed. “What is it?”

“Am…I interrupting anything?” she asked. Her eyes flitted between her two superiors as she smoothed her bangs against her head.

“No,” Rufus said simply. 

“W-well…” Her brief bashfulness was quickly replaced with annoyance as she held the plastic bag up, filled with green shavings. “Sir, I’ve been doing locker inspection, and I found _this!”  
_

“Where?” Tseng asked. 

He restrained himself from mouthing the answer along with her. “1st-class Genesis Rhapsodos’!” she huffed. “This is marijuana!”

“I know,” Tseng replied.

“Can you confiscate it?” 

“Why?” 

She stared dumbfounded, fumbling without an answer. “W-well, b-because…i-it’s company policy not to have drugs on the premises, so--” 

Tseng stood up from his desk, back protesting almost immediately, and he rubbed at his temple. “I am aware of company policy,” he muttered. “But I’d just put that back if I were you.”

Elena’s jaw dropped. “Y-you can’t be serious!” she scoffed. 

“Rhapsodos again?” Rufus said, shaking his head. “No, he’ll just be back with more. You’d be better off putting that back.” 

“Put it _back?!”_ She waggled the bag in front of her. “What? You’ve got to be--” She huffed in frustration. “Excuse me for saying this, but I think the 1sts get _way_ too much leeway.”

_It’s like I’m looking in a mirror,_ Tseng thought as she rambled. _If this were twenty, maybe thirty years ago. How long has it been? Maybe I do need a vacation._ His headache seemed to be growing stronger. _Damn it…_

“Honestly,” Elena continued. “I _know_ this isn’t the first time. Why haven’t you just _fired_ Rhapsodos? He barely does anything on base!” 

Rufus raised an eyebrow and exchanged a look with Tseng. “Why indeed?” he muttered. 

* * *

 

1987.

President Rufus Shinra’s office was on the top floor of an adjacent building to the main Shinra HQ, It was surrounded by glass windows, pristine and organized. The desk itself was as long as Rufus was tall, polished mahogany, piles of papers to be signed and reviewed in a neat pile at the center. _It’s quiet now,_ he thought to himself, pink sunset beginning to filter behind him. _Not for long. Next week I travel to Wutai to start negotiations to drill over there. It is the only place_ he _never touched._ It caught on a portrait of his father, president before him. There was a small, gold plaque with an inscription below it: 1932-1983.

_I was molded to take this position,_ he mused. _But I never imagined it would be…this early. His death was sudden. Papers reported heart failure. In the end, likely, but it was a complication from AIDS. And now, Dr. Hojo--_

_(Narrowed eyes, looking down over his glasses and crooked nose, wife behind him. “I hope you live up to your name,” he sneered, barely loud enough for him to hear. “Boy…”)_

_\--seems bent on finding some cure._ He sighed and pushed his glasses up. _I wouldn’t want anyone to end up like my father did, withering away, but…_ Rufus picked up a lab report from the top of his stack. _SOLDIER are at the heart of this particular program. “Rats are insufficient,” he says, “we need humans, and we need the best. For the greater good.”_ The list of names on the report went on to a second page. _This is an entire company of 2nds…_

_Gone._

A Turk burst through his office door. “Mr. President!” he panted. “Th-there’s been-- _hgh--!”  
_

His sentence was cut short by a whack to the back as he crumbled to the floor. Behind him was a man in a 2nd-class SOLDIER uniform, red sword in his hand with the blade behind facing behind him. Auburn hair hung in his face, but it couldn’t disguise his mako blue eyes, glowing with rage, and his teeth clenched. Rufus rose quickly, opening a drawer beside him with a gun in it. _SOLDIER?  
_

The Turk struggled to scramble to his feet, but the SOLDIER spun his blade in his hand and pointed it toward him. “Don’t get up,” he growled. “Don’t fucking--”

“Stay back!” the Turk yelped. He fumbled a gun out of his suit and pointed it at him. “I’ll--”

The SOLDIER only grinned, and in a flash, he knocked the gun out of his hand with his sword, sending it skittering across the floor. “What the fuck did I just say?” he said. “Stay fucking _down.”  
_

He then turned on Rufus, sword still out, with a deranged look in his eye. “You…” He strode forward, right up to the desk. “What the fuck do you think you’re thinking?” 

“I could ask the same of you,” Rufus retorted, an odd calm over his features despite the palpable rage emanating from the man in front of him. “State your name and rank.”

“Genesis Rhapsodos, 2nd-class,” he replied through grit teeth. “Now are you gonna tell me _why_ you fucking tried to kill all of us?”

Sets of footsteps could be heard behind him, and Rufus’ eyes flicked behind. _Backup. Good. There’s no need to worry. Even if there’s a sword in my face, I have a gun._ Then, he glanced down at the report he was examining. _Is he…from this company? But…_

He spotted “RHAPSODOS, GENESIS” under the list. _Everyone was…_

_“Hey!_ Fucking _look at me,_ you bastard!” Genesis hollered, jabbing the sword forward. “I want some fucking _answers!”  
_

He swore he could hear the click of the metal against his glasses as he jerked up, and he pulled the gun out of the drawer. “You’re from that experiment?” he asked. “It says here everyone died. Including you.”

“Well?! Here I fucking am!” His voice rasped as he spoke, and he jumped on the desk, scattering the immaculate neatness of it into chaos. With a twist of his wrist, his red sword was right against the president’s neck, and he crouched close. “I might be fucking alive, but _what did you do to us?!”  
_

_“2nd-class! Stand down!”  
_

An entourage of five Turks surrounded the desk, all with their guns out. Genesis only spared them a brief glance. “Tell me why after our little ‘booster’, I woke up fucking strapped to a gurney, bruises all over my fucking arms!?” He spread his arms wide, and Rufus indeed could see the needle marks, blotches of purple and brown along the crease of his arm…and further up. “Tell me why my best friend was, too! Tell me why the whole rest of the fucking company was a pile of bloody bodies in the basement! _Fucking tell me!”  
_

He stood up suddenly, and it was enough for one of the Turks to open fire. The gunshot missed, whether it was from Genesis hopping off the desk or poor aim; the hole was visible in the ceiling. _If there is one thing I know, it’s that Turks rarely miss,_ he thought, backing up from his desk with a death grip on his gun. _So--_

Genesis faced the five Turks, finding the first one who fired and immediately punched him in the face with his sword hand. “I had to drag him out of there!” he continued, kicking him down to his knees. With an elbow to the head, the Turk crumbled. “I saw those fuckin’ bodies, they were deformed! What kind of fucking-- _experiments--!”  
_

He whirled to the next Turk as more shots fired, each one not seeming to do any damage while his sword whirled in the air. It knocked his target’s gun away, and a hard blow to the stomach sent the next Turk flying into the opposite wall, head rolling back against it. The glow in Genesis’ eyes was more palpable now, and each movement he made was a blur in his eyes. _So, this is SOLDIER,_ Rufus thought. _And only 2nd-class…_

_“Do you know what it’s like?!”_ Genesis continued to scream. “Do you know what it’s like to see that glow in your own fucking eyes?! To see--fu-fucking limbs! And _wings!_ On the men you knew?! Reduced to nothing! You’re making monsters out of all of us! You heartless son of a bitch--! And who knows! Who fucking-- _argh!”  
_

A Turk with dark sunglasses on finally managed to grab his arms and wrap them behind his back, sword clattering on the floor. “Let go of me!” Genesis raged, spittle flying from his lips. “If you don’t give a shit about the rest of us, I’ll fucking kill you!” 

He wriggled free, and grabbed the Turk by the head and flung him across the office. He hit the glass window with a sickening smack, leaving a bloody crack in his wake as he slid to the floor. Genesis stopped with a halt, hands shaking in front of him, blue eyes still wide. “What did you do to us…?” he breathed. Tears suddenly started streaming down his face. “What did you do? _What did you do?!”  
_

Speechless, Rufus could only watch as another Turk, this one with long, dark hair, restrained him once again. “Stand _down,”_ he muttered, then glanced up at Rufus. “Sir, he escaped from the labs, he’s seen everything…”

“Everything?” Rufus asked.

Genesis continued to struggle, but not as vigorously as before. “Fuckers, all of you!” he spat. “You’ve made us _monsters!_ You sell us all on fucking honor?! You killed all of them! You almost killed Angeal! Who knows what else you’ve done, that we can’t fucking _see--!”  
_

He came close to wriggling free, but the Turk-- _Tseng, that’s his name,_ Rufus remembered--gave him a sharp hit to the side of the neck, then to the back of it. Genesis’ eyes went wide, then he fell limp, and Tseng eased him to the ground. Then, he took out his gun, the latch of the safety click resonating in the newly found silence. “Permission to fire,” he muttered.

In that moment, Rufus hesitated. _Sacrifices always need to be made,_ he thought. _Father said that. Hojo continues to say that. If he lives, it will be a crisis. I already have to organize something to cover up all of these deaths--per Hojo’s request. A full wipe of the company is easier to cover, rather than any loose ends. But…_

_“Gen!”  
_

Another SOLDIER in 2nd-class garb rushed through. The two remaining Turks immediately pointed their guns at him. He was much bigger than Genesis, in both height and bulk, but he carried no weapon, and he held both of his hands up. Despite his look of strength, he had bandages wrapped over the inner crease of both arms, bruises showing up just above where the wrappings ended. “L-Listen, I…” he started, then glanced down at Genesis. “Oh no, God damn it, Gen…”

Ignoring the threat of fire, he fell to his knees at his unconscious comrade’s side. “You must be the one he was talking about,” Rufus muttered. “An…geal?” 

“2nd-class Angeal Hewley, sir,” he replied, keeping his attention down. “You idiot, Gen, only you would…”

Tseng’s aim didn’t waver from Genesis’ head, but he did turn to Rufus in question. _He’s dangerous,_ he thought. _But he’s talented. If he had actually used his sword, he could have easily killed everyone in this room. Imagine him on a battlefield…if he can be tamed.  
_

_Would it be better to put him out of his misery, or make him fight?_

He shook his head, and with a sigh, Tseng lowered his gun.

Angeal lifted his head and looked around. “J-Jesus,” he muttered. While he had the opposite disposition of his friend--calm, if worried--his blue eyes also had an odd film over them. “What happened? Did he…?” 

“He had quite the temper tantrum,” Tseng sighed. “To be frank, he should be put down.” He rolled his head over to Rufus as he put the safety back on his gun and pocketed it. “But, that’s not what you’re going to say, is it?” 

“A man like him is reckless and dangerous,” Rufus stated, hands behind his back, still clutching his gun. “And he knows too much.”

“S-so…” Angeal’s shoulders tensed.

“So he’s a perfect candidate for 1st-class,” Rufus continued. “Provided…he can prove himself. And he doesn’t kill anyone in the company along the way.”

Angeal’s mouth dropped open as he lifted Genesis up, throwing his arm over his own broad shoulders. “I-I--” 

“Tell your friend if he doesn’t get any ideas, he can stay,” Rufus said with narrowed eyes. “But he is going to be _under watch.”  
_

“Y-yes, sir.” Angeal nodded, and quickly carried him out, dragging his feet along behind him. 

As soon as he was out the door, Tseng put a finger to his ear. “I need a medic in the President’s office,” he muttered, then glared at Rufus. “You’re making a mistake. He’s a risk.”

“We can run him through some psychiatric tests if he really seems worrying. But he’ll be a powerful SOLDIER. 1st-class is completely different than 2nd. He’ll fit right in.”

_“If_ you can control him.” 

As Rufus finally relaxed, setting his gun down on the desk, his gaze fell on the lab reports again. This time, Genesis’ and Angeal’s names seemed to stand out among the blur of text. “It can be done,” he muttered. _If I’m understanding this report correctly, and as underhanded as it will be…it can be done.  
_

* * *

 

1997.

Elena tapped her foot, heels marking on the tile. “What, is this classified?” she asked. 

Tseng sighed hard enough to move his shoulders. “It is, actually,” he replied. “And it is a long story. Just put that back and be on your way.” 

She curled her lip, but chose not to protest--instead, she turned on her heel and muttered to herself as she cruised back down the hallway. 

Rufus patted Tseng’s desk. “Speaking of Genesis,” he said. “It really brought me back when he pointed his sword at me again recently.”

“I can’t imagine how that’s a pleasant memory for you,” Tseng groaned.

“It’s not,” he said. “With the way he was dodging fire, he really could have killed me then. But I know more now. I think he just enjoys the theatrics.”

“Genesis is still as dangerous as he ever was. And he’s found an ally in Sephiroth, who is possibly worse.” _The only thing Sephiroth has against Genesis is a lack of bloodthirst and a more level head,_ Tseng thought. _Whether it’s better or worse, I still can’t tell.  
_

“They’re powerful, sure,” Rufus remarked, crossing his arms. “But they can be cut down. Your team is better at an ambush, and if they act up, they know they will be killed. And without fanfare.” He paused. “They’re tethered here.”

Tseng nodded slowly. _I think they already know that. I can see it in their distant looks. And those feathers all the 1sts wear…_

“Anyway,” he sighed, “you wanted to ask me something?”

Tseng clenched his teeth inside his mouth. _Right. I was going to ask you about the whole SOLDIER program in general. Hojo was the driving force to keep it going, with the mako experiments among many, many other things. I thought maybe now that he was gone, you might put a cap on it. Maybe stop building human weapons._

_But…by that tone, and the look in your eyes…that doesn’t seem to be the case._

“Sorry, I forgot,” Tseng replied, pulling open his desk for a bottle of migraine pills. “Likely wasn’t important…”

Rufus chuckled. “It’s almost 5. Go home. That’s where I’m headed.” He waved with one hand, then laced both behind his back. “Have a good night.” 

_Sure,_ Tseng thought, swallowing three pills dry. _After I file this folder you put on my desk, and the pile after that. No rest for the wicked.  
_

_Or the weary._


	12. Lounge Act

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This can take place anytime before Angeal takes off. 
> 
> Original publish date: 2/23/17

1997.

With the amp screeching feedback, Sephiroth huffed and unplugged his guitar. “I’m bored,” he stated.

Zack held his tongue. _Well, we have been practice the same thing for like…an hour? It seems like it’s been eternity. What time is it even?_ He glanced across the room at the clock ticking by in the rehearsal room. _I got too used to having Cloud or Aerith around during practice, and Tifa’s not ready to drum with us yet. Just not the same.  
_

“Well? What do you suggest we do then?” Genesis asked, idly plucking his bass. “Turn in early?”

“No. _Never.”_ His brow furrowed as he paced from Zack’s amp at one end of the room to Genesis’ amp at the other. “We have too much work to do. We need to plan for another gig. All new material. Polished. More original songs. More.”

“Settle down, Seph,” Angeal sighed, crossing his arms. “I still think you’re sights are set too high. I mean, we’ve got one gig under our belt, and our demo tape is out there. We ought to record--”

“Too high? Tch.” He scoffed and stuck his nose in the air. “There’s no such thing.”

“Damn right,” Genesis muttered with a smirk.

“Not what I meant, you fucking...” He trailed off before he could get further, then resumed his pacing. “Let me just think of something…”

Zack leaned against his amp and took the moment to catch his breath. _Demanding, demanding, Jesus. I wanna just go home. Aerith took the day off, said she was gonna bake something nice for dinner…I could really dig a casserole of some kind, good home cooking like Ma used to make…_

While Sephiroth continued to pace, Genesis slowly turned up his amp and began playing a bass riff--steady, but laced with syncopation. Perking up, Sephiroth turned on one heel and made his way over to him. “That’s…” he muttered.

Genesis raised an eyebrow. “Been a while since we played this one,” he said.

“For a reason,” he replied, crossing his arms while Genesis continued to play. “Singing and playing this one is too taxing, despite its simplicity.” 

“Uh-huh.” He leaned his head around Sephiroth. “Yo, Zack. C’mere.”

“What?” Sephiroth spat as Zack pushed himself off the amp to make his way over. “What are you suggesting?” 

“You just take the mic,” Genesis replied, eyes down on Zack’s guitar. “Here, you’ve got a good ear on you. Follow me. Just one chord through this part...”

He switched to pedaling the root note, which Zack picked up on almost immediately. “Just this?” he asked, barring the chord. 

“Yeah,” Genesis said.

“No,” Sephiroth contested, squinting. “It sounds wrong. It’s too basic. Your fing--”

“Shut up,” Genesis interrupted, inviting a glare. While Zack held his breath, Genesis ignored it. “I know, it’s the wrong voicing, but you’re going to have to deal with it. Anyway, chorus goes like this…”

Zack paused to listen, as the bass pushed through the progression. He also made a note to not make eye contact with Sephiroth. _I don’t feel like riling him up today. Gen obviously does. As he tends to do. And gets away with._ After a few cycles through the progression, he found himself catching up with it, hitting the right chords with almost the same speed. Genesis nodded. “Yeah. See, that’s it. That’s all you’ve got to do.” He craned his neck back toward Angeal. “You remember this one?”

“Nirvana tune, right?” Angeal said, picking up his sticks again. “Yeah, pretty much. That one was a screamer, wasn’t it Seph? You up to it?”

Sephiroth sighed enough for it to lift his shoulders. “Of _course_ I’m up to it.” He flicked his hair back over his shoulder and approached his mic, gripping the stand with one hand and the handle of the microphone with the other. “Fine. We’ll do it. Just to blow off some steam.”

He rolled his shoulders back, then glared over at Genesis. “Well? Start.”

His smirk was lazy in reply. “Ask me nicely.”

_“Please. Start.”_

He shook his head and chuckled while he played the main riff again, this time with Angeal tapping his foot on the hi-hat in time. _Yeah, I’ve heard this song before. Starts with the bass, then gets into it. I’ll just…follow Genesis, I guess._ Angeal counted off a bar, and with a nod to Zack, he came in with the simple guitar vamp, strumming in rhythm. _This would sound better if it moved a little bit. Sounds kinda like…this?_ He shifted his chords just a bit, and while Sephiroth side-eyed him, it wasn’t for long before he focused himself to sing:

_“Truth covered in security, I can’t let you smother me,_  
I’d like to but it couldn’t work, trading off and taking turns.  
I don’t regret a thing…”

_Damn,_ Zack thought, watching even as Genesis started creeping away from his amp. _I don’t think I’ve heard him sing without playing as well. It’s a hell of a lot more focused._ Genesis’ smirk had turned into a grin as he approached Sephiroth from the side. _And what the hell are you doing?  
_

_“And I’ve got this friend, you see, who makes me feel,_  
And I wanted more than I could steal,  
I’ll arrest myself, I’ll wear a shield,  
I’ll go out of my way to prove I still smell her on you…”

Zack nearly missed the bridge, watching the scene unfold, but he retreated back to the haven of the drumkit to watch Angeal’s hits to stay in time. _At least I’ve got you, man,_ he thought, catching Angeal’s eye. He jerked his head over to the front, and Angeal just shrugged and shook his head. _Yeah, same here.  
_

Sephiroth was oblivious to Genesis stalking him around the mic, eyes closed and gripping the mic, swaying gently to his own singing. 

_“Don’t tell me what I want to hear, afraid of never knowing fear,_  
Experience anything you need, I’ll keep fighting jealousy  
Until it’s fucking gone...”

As he went back into the chorus, Genesis started mouthing along with him, but not singing. _This is on another level,_ Zack thought, shaking his head. _I mean, it was pretty obvious when they were on stage together, but during rehearsal? Jesus._ At the last line of the chorus, Genesis suddenly leaned up into the mic and sang a harmony, grainy and open-sounding against Sephiroth’s low baritone. It was only then that Sephiroth opened one eye to catch him. As soon as he stopped singing, he pushed him away and cleared his throat off mic. 

Genesis leaped back, unfazed. “Here we go,” he said over the drums. “Listen to this…”

When the bar turned around, Sephiroth sang again--although Zack wasn’t sure if he should call it singing, as it sounded more like raspy screaming in his ears. The cords on his neck stood out as he gripped the mic stand, leaning forward with it, hair falling in a sheath around him. _He sure is going for it,_ he thought, clenching his teeth in his mouth. While Angeal showed no expression to his act, Genesis was delighted--blue eyes bright and wide as he stared at him. As he came into the last chorus, he crept up toward him again, slapping his bass more aggressively.

_“…I’ll go out of my way to make you a deal_  
We’ve made a pact to learn from whoever we want without new rules,  
We’ll share what’s lost and what we grew,   
They’ll go out of their way to prove they still smell her on you…  
Smell her on you…”

Sephiroth’s voice reached its limit, grating enough to make the microphone feed back as close as it was. With the last word, he staggered back and let the mic stand go, wobbling in his absence. He backed right into Genesis, still holding out the last note on his bass. He eyed him as he caught his breath, then shoved him back by the shoulder. “Fucker,” he muttered. 

“Wasn’t that fun?” Genesis retorted, still wearing a shit-eating grin. “You’re not bored anymore, are you?”

“My throat fucking hurts, _that’s_ for sure,” Sephiroth mumbled, coughing to the side. “I’m getting some water. And not taking anymore of your ideas.”

“I didn’t say anything.”

“Fuck you.”

Sephiroth offered him a middle finger before whirling out the door, slamming it behind him. Genesis chuckled as he wandered back to his amp. “Hey, Gen,” Angeal asked.

“Yeah?” he replied.

“Why are you like this?” 

“Like what?” He picked up the copy of LOVELESS sitting open on the amp with one hand, and flipped the next page with his thumb. “Hm?”

Angeal sighed heavily. _“This.”_

He didn’t reply, just shook his head and turned his attention down. Zack and Angeal exchanged an exasperated look. _Dude, if you don’t know after growing up with this guy, how is anyone supposed to?_ he thought. He scratched the back of his neck and pulled out his pager. _Half hour left. Maybe now Seph will let us go early. Please, just release me…_


	13. Sleepless

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original publish date: 5/30/17

2002.

Aerith stirred out of a dead sleep to a wail coming from outside. _Oh, the baby’s crying._ Beside her, Zack was still asleep, snoring, while Tifa had her head under the pillow. Even at 2 AM, she couldn’t help but snicker. _Is she blocking out his snoring or her crying? Oh, and…_

_…where’s Cloud?  
_

She whipped the covers off herself and tip-toed down the hall in her slip. _The realtors said this was one of the smaller 3 bedroom places, but it’s still huge. Well, compared to the Midgar basement, anything would be._ The crib room door was open a crack, and the whining, wailing cry of the baby had already died down. _Ah…_

Cloud paced back and forth, holding her in his arms. “Shh, shh…” he murmured, then looked over his shoulder. “Hey. You wanna take her? She might be hungry…”

“I think she’s just fussy,” Aerith replied, but still held her arms out. She took the baby in her arms and kissed her dark, fine hair. “Oh, Rosie, Rosie, Rosie…” 

She held her by the bottom before cradling her properly. _Her diaper seems fine. Suppose he could’ve figured that out pretty quick, if he hadn’t already._ In her mother’s arms, Rosie soon quieted down, tiny fingers pawing at Aerith’s neck. “You didn’t have to get up, hon,” she said to Cloud as he yawned. “It’s my turn, anyway--”

“I was already up,” he said. He sighed with a small smirk. “Might as well make myself useful, huh…?” 

Aerith frowned, but patted the baby’s back in a steady rhythm. _This is one of the first nights you’ve been here, rather than on night shift. Maybe that’s why? God, you really work too hard. Tifa worries about you all the time…_ “Can’t sleep?” 

“Yeah, the night shifts are messing me up.” He ran a hand back through his spiked hair. “What time is it? Two or something…?”

“Uh-huh.” 

Cloud sighed through his nose. “Maybe I’ll get some sleep before work…if I can.” He glanced over at Aerith, then back down at the floor. “Bad dreams lately.”

“Oh?” she asked.

He stared out through the window, where the city lights of Midgar still shined strong in the velvet dark. “It’s been…what, five years since the mako accident?”

“Almost six.”

He shook his head. “I still have…nightmares about it. Everything’s in a blue film, and I can’t move, and I’ve got to watch Zack…and Ti…”

“Hey…” Aerith used one arm to hold the baby, beginning to doze, and the other to rub his shoulder. 

“Even y-you’re in them, too,” Cloud continued, chewing his lip. “It’s just…I-I know, it’s just a dream, a lot of shit’s different, but…still.”

“Yeah, I know.” _A lot_ is _different. For one, you’re not as anxious as you used to be. Meds helped, and training new SOLDIER pretty steadily has helped you, too. 1st-class and all.  
_

He touched her hand on his shoulder, revealing the silver and gold braided band on his finger, and offered her a quiet smile. _But, you’re still the same quiet, shy person I met in the Shinra rehearsal room, who called me “ma’am” on instinct, and had the biggest, star-struck eyes for Zack Fair…_

With a quick squeeze, he released her hand, allowing her to readjust the baby. “You should take some time off. Seriously,” Aerith said. Rosie’s breathing relaxed enough for her to wander back to the crib and ease her down on her back. “You’re working weekends too, aren’t you?” 

“Yeah. Well, Zack’s gotta be home…for the baby.” Cloud gestured to the crib before scratching his chest over his shirt. “So, I gotta be around base to cover--”

“He’d cover for you, you know that,” Aerith said, then winked at him. “Besides, she’s your kid, too. Just like Dezzie’s ours. We’re _all_ a family. Together.” 

He covered his mouth, clearly hiding a bigger smile, judging by the shape of his cheeks. Then he blinked, but still spoke behind his cupped hand. “Oh, would you mind picking him up from school tomorrow?”

“You still don’t like him taking the bus out by himself, do you?” she asked. 

“He’s only ten.”

“But he’s going to school above the plate. He’ll be fine.” 

Cloud sighed. “Maybe. But, I’d rather wait ‘til he gets into middle school before then…”

She shook her head and tugged on his arm. “You are such a _dad,”_ she chided. _I guess most of that worry and anxiety had to go somewhere._ “Come to bed. Zack misses you.” 

Cloud allowed himself to be drawn out of the bedroom with a snicker. “Zack is _dead_ asleep, and you know it.”

"Oh, humor me, will you?” she replied, sticking her tongue out. 

They walked to the bedroom, arm and arm, and before Cloud returned to the other side of the bed, he paused and kissed the top of Aerith’s head quickly. “Good night,” he whispered.

“Get some sleep, okay?” she said. _I think even though I’m the new mom, you’re the one who needs it the most.  
_

She cuddled in next to Zack, who, upon sensing her presence, wrapped an arm around her waist, cementing her in place. On the other side, she heard Tifa and Cloud murmuring to each other, before a soft kissing sound returned the room to silence. With a yawn and the warmth of her partner beside her, Aerith closed her eyes and started to drift. _Sometimes, even with the stressful stuff that’s gone on, I keep thinking I’m going to wake up from this dream I’m having. The dream where I have a huge bed, and three other wonderful people in it…_

_…people I can call my family, that I chose, that I love…_

She smiled to herself. _Don’t wake me up yet._


	14. Showers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's some sexual innuendo in here, but nothing outright explicit. Original publish date: 6/19/17

1983.

Sweat running down his brow, Angeal stripped his soaked tanktop in the Banora High locker room. _Christ, why do we have to be outside when it’s this sunny and hot?_ he thought to himself. The static of running water echoed all throughout the locker room as he grabbed a towel. _And I was the last one in…_

Voices of other boys came from all the stalls, all of them full with running water. _And I’ve only got ten minutes. Who knows how long these guys are going to take._ Scanning below at the feet showing, he knocked on a stall. “Hey, you about done?” 

“Just a sec, Hewley…” the voice dismissed. _Yeah, that means no._ Angeal shook his head and kept walking down the aisle.

As soon as he reached the end, he paced back around with his arms crossed, the sweat down his broad, thick back growing more and more uncomfortable. _Oh yeah,_ he _was in today. And the first one off the field. So…looks like I’ve got no choice.  
_

He cupped his hands around his mouth. “Oy, _Gen!”  
_

The chatter of the locker room went quiet, except for a lazy groan. “Hmmmm?” it said. At the second to last stall down, a pair of arms draped over the top of the stall, and a head topped with dark auburn red peered up. “Heyyyy.” 

_Christ. “Can I split a shower with you? I’m not gonna make it to 8th period…”  
_

To both his relief and dismay, Genesis grinned. “Sure,” he said, then unlatched the door. “C’mooooooon in…” 

A voice followed him as Angeal made a bee-line for the door. “You gonna shower with the faggot?” a boy said with a nasty sneer. “Better not drop the soap.” 

“Knock it off,” Angeal muttered, head down. _He doesn’t care, but I do. Gen’s probably sucked half the dicks in this school, and that guy’s probably one of them. Besides, Gen knows better than to make a move on me…_

_(”C’mon, c’mon, please…please, just once…”)_

_At least,_ now _he does._

As he entered the stall and shut the door behind him, he stripped down the rest of the way, avoiding Genesis’ roaming eyes. “Thanks, man,” he said, then stepped under the stream of water. Instantly, he yelped and jumped back. “What the _fuck?!”  
_

Genesis’ eyes were rimmed red, and he just stood and smiled at him. “Hmm? What? Whassamatter?” he slurred. 

“This is _ice cold!”_ Angeal exclaimed, hugging his arms. “How the hell…?” 

Genesis snickered and stuck his face right underneath the water. “Fuck, man. This is the only way I can get through the rest of the day. Kills my high just a bit, but not enough…”

He shook his hair out, spraying tiny droplets everywhere. _“Haaaah…”_ he sighed. “You don’t think it feels good? _Mmn…”_

_Don’t make those noises,_ Angeal thought with a frown. He tip-toed back underneath the water, shuddering as he reached for the knob to make it just a little warmer. _I swear, all you think about is drugs, and sex…_

“Hey,” Genesis asked. “You wanna stay after today and practice some?” _  
_

Angeal looked down at him with pause _. Well, maybe not_ just _drugs and sex._ “Sure,” he replied. “Just for a bit, I’ve got homework--” _  
_

“Homework, shmo-mework, you’re gonna go off to join Shinra, who the fuck cares about homework?” Genesis checked him with his hip. “C’mon, don’t hog the water, dude…” _  
_

* * *

 

1999\. 

Sephiroth woke up before his alarm went off to the hollow chorus of running water. _What the hell?_ He sat up and ran a hand through his sleek, silver hair. _The hellions didn’t spend the night, not tonight. Did…? Oh, for fuck’s sake.  
_

He threw the covers off him, glancing down for a second to realize he was completely naked. _What the hell did we do last night?_ He wracked his brain for answers as he rushed to his dresser for a pair of pajama pants. _I can’t imagine us getting high enough to come back here…if that were the case, we would’ve gone back to his apartment.  
_

_But, things aren’t how they used to be, so…_

Shoving his long legs into the silk pants, he rushed to the bathroom and burst through the door. “What are you doing here?” he demanded.

“Good morning, beautiful,” Genesis answered, not bothering to part the curtain. “Your door was unlocked.”

_Fuck._ “That doesn’t give you permission to just barge in.” 

“I think it does. Why don’t you just give me a key, already? Or move in?” 

“I don’t _trust you._ Besides, I really do not wish to smell like _weed_ all the damn time.” 

“It showers off.”

“That’s what you--” Sephiroth stopped himself and shook his head. “Why aren’t you in your own damn shower?!” 

“I dunno.” He slurred the phrase into one smooth syllable as he peeked out from the curtain with a wicked grin. “Why don’t you come in and find out~?” 

Sephiroth scowled. “I hate you.” 

“Not what you said last night.” 

“I _highly_ doubt that.” 

“Notice I said ‘last night’, not ‘yesterday’.” 

Sephiroth rolled his eyes as he took off the pajamas he had just put on, one leg at a time. While he did appreciate Genesis’ eyes on him, he chose not to show it, pushing him back into the shower with one hand before he got in. He immediately stuck his head under the water, then gasped. “Fucking shit!” 

“Too cold?” Genesis asked. 

“Too cold?!” Sephiroth continued to gasp, lunging around him to crank the knob. “BASIC showers were not this cold. What are you thinking?!” 

“You didn’t know? I’ve been doing this since high school.” Genesis ran his hands back through his hair and stayed stuck to the side wall, just out of reach from the water. “If I shower too hot, I just fuckin’ bake. I’ll be too high to leave.” 

“You’re _high right now?”_

“Not now. But I used to be.” Genesis smirked. “What, do you want some morning dope?” 

“No.”

He inched forward and rested his hands on his lower hips. “How about some morning head?” he purred, tongue slipping out. 

Sephiroth squinted at him with his lips pursed _. Bastard. Bastard!_ “Only if you’re quick,” he hissed through grit teeth. 

With wide eyes and no hesitation, Genesis dropped to his knees.


End file.
